i once asked my father why bird excrement was white. he told me it was because it got *really* scared on the way down.

urbanblight

We convinced my younger Brother, Mark that the sea gulls weren't calling aaark, but they were calling Maaarrrk and were going to get him. You'll be glad to know that he has recovered against the odds into a well adjusted adult.

Scaussie

When I was about 7 yrs old our chickens would jump over the fence and dig up mums garden so Dad said he was going to chop their toenails off, using an axe (!) of all things. Little did I know but he was actually chopping their heads off and right up until I was about 15 I really believed that chickens would die if you cut their toenails off.

Johanna

We used to take the bus all the time when I was a kid, as our family didn't have a car. One day, there were a bunch of pigeons around the bus stop, and one of them was making that "coo coo" noise. I asked my dad why the pigeon was cooing, and he told me that it was because it was pregnant.

When I was 20, I was with my girlfriend, and heard a pigeon cooing. I exclaimed, "Wow, a pregnant pigeon!" She soon had me straightened out.

Jamie

My sister loved geese and swans, but when it came to ducks, she for some VERY strange reason she thought that they were the devil's minions. It was quite a sight to see her running in the park towards all the ducks and hear her scream in front of everyone, "GO AWAY YOU MEANIES!! YOU WON'T TAKE MY SOUL TO THE DEVIL!!"

Lydia

I used to always think that the only time birds flew over people's heads is when they had to go to the bathroom. I used to always run away whenever I played in the backyard thinking they would poop on my head.

Scott

I used to think that birds sang in different languages depending on the country they were in!

Sarah

I use to believe that the Schwan's food truck carried swans... not food. So whenever it came to my house, I got really excited and thought we were getting a new pet. But that never happened...

Anon

I thought that ground turkey refered to turkeys grown underground. I wondered why they did that, as they only ever became little strips...

Gobble

My two year old believes that electiricty poles are actually there for the birds. "They hold up ropes for the birds to stand on".

Sonia Timms

I was six years old when Alfred Hitchcock’s "The Birds" was released. My family and I saw it and truthfully, it really frightened me! To add to my fears, my parents thought it would be fun to visit Bodega Bay. When we arrived, the green grass in front of the hotel we were staying in, was covered with crows. I didn’t want to get out of the car. My younger brother and younger sister laughed at me. They convinced me to get out because in "reality" they told me, the birds only attack at night. Come night fall, I was under the bed and very very upset! My family laughed and laughed. I slept under that bed all night and was angry at them for laughing. Of course, that was over 40 years ago and I am now an avid bird watcher and part of Cornell University’s Project Feeder Watch. However, I do confess, on occasion, when I see a black crow, I wonder……..

jc

Once my mom was cracking egss to make breakfast and I asked her why they had not turned into chickens. She said because the eggs "had not been fertilized." So for the longest time I pictured park rangers or other official people going from nest to nest all over the world carrying a bag of fertilizer and sprinkling it on birds' eggs.

Shanon

I used to believe that if you planted magpie (an Australian bird) feathers, you could grow one. My elder brothers convinced me this was true by placing a magpie chick in the garden one morning

Pigeon Toes

Apparently, when I was little, I used to try and grow chickens by 'planting' their feathers in the ground.

Mat

When I was young (about 3-4 years old) I believed that owls lived in keyholes. Therefore, I would not go too close to a keyhole, unless there was a key in it, which would prevent the owls from coming out and attacking me. Fortunately, after a while my parents bought me a somewhat lifesize toy owl, which made me realize that owls were too big to live in keyholes.

Brian

I used to believe that bird perched on telephone wires to keep their feet warm

Anon

That our car roof was a roosting place for incredibly noisy and thus large birds. It wasn't until I was six that I noticed that these bird landings corresponded exactly with my Dads arm being out of the car window.

Chris

Actually my niece. The first time she a penquin she took what she had in her available lexicon and came up with "Cowduck". Pretty smart for a 2 year old

Naomi

Back in the day when it was safe to walk home from kindergarten by yourself, my mom had one rule: that we cross the street holding the teacher's hand.

So one day, I didn't wait for the teacher and ran across the street. When I got home, my mom asked me why I didn't cross the street with the teacher. I was perplexed as to how she knew. When I asked, she replied that a little bird told her (she used to run up an alley to the school, watch us cross the street and run home).

For the next couple of years I was convinced that my mom talked to birds. I was very careful to make sure none were around if I were breaking rules!

Ricky B.

You know how when you drive down the street, birds fly right in front of your windshield?
Well, when I was little I used to think the birds were all sitting in a tree, daring each other who fly closest to the cars going by without getting hit.

seightenn