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i used to believe
cats & dogs

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My sister told me many times that dogs are a shark's favourite food. I got to thinking after a while that it would be quite difficult for a shark to acquire a taste for dog, seeing as how dogs live on land and all. It kind of got a grip on me though because we had a lot of shark attacks in the ocean where we lived in the 60s. We would swim a lot through the long hot summers, and I always felt concern if a dog went in the water, and reassured myself that if a shark came then as long as I kept my eye on the dog I would have some warning to get out of the water. Not really a relaxing swim though.

Frank
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I once asked my dad why Pugs had flat faces. He responded "because they ran into a wall"...

Kristy
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When I was young, I had this golden retreiver, and every day I would go outside to play with her. When we would play, I'd pretend that I was her date to a formal dance and say, "may I have this dance?" She'd give me her paw, and then we'd dance. I seriously thought that my dog understood what I was saying, and was one excellent dancer.

Rissa
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When I was about 7 years old, my dog humped my leg. I didn't know what he was doing, I thought it was just a little dance or something, so I'd let him do it whenever he wanted. Later, my sister told me what he was actually doing. I was horrified and couldn't sleep very well for a month. I was convinced that I was going to have puppies.

A Cat Person
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When I was younger, I use to believe that cats & dogs had special langauge all their own and thats why when one dog was barking all the other dogs in the neighborhood would start barking and so on.

My parents became very concerned however, when they would discover me sitting crosslegged in front of my dog or the neighbors cat coaxing it to "teach" me it's secret language so I could properly communicate.

The dog whisperer
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Well when i was a kid to like my 10-12 i thought that all the animals were able to talk but that it was forbidden for them to talk infront of us or that we just weren't able to hear them.And each time my cat and my dog were together in a room alone,i was spying them to see if the y were going to talk,but all that i could see was my cat hitting my dog on the nose and leaving,which then made me believe that they were talking and having a coupple fight or something.

KittyCat
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When my daughter was an infant, my stepmother-in-law warned me, "don't let the cat near the baby...cats will put their mouth on a baby's and suck the life out of them." She was completely serious.

new mom with a cat
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Bearing in mind my mother called my penis my 'tail' I was always so worried about being near dogs because they tended to wag their tails a lot and I didn't want to get covered in wee.

Mux
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When I was about 11 yrs old I asked my mom how kittens were born and she said "through their mother's mouth". For many years I believed it and thought nothing about it. I was well into my forties when I found out the truth through a friend.

Lilliana
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I used to believe that my dogs could talk to me...all I had to do was practice barking so I could understand them.

JamesBP
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I used to believe that my dog could speak English, but he just didn't feel like it.

Mariah
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when I was little, I used to belive that if I didn't go for lots of walks with my dog, she would eventually explode.Which made it so I walked my dog everyother hour.

Lucy B
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I used to think that my cats knew much more than humans do--regarding the meaning of life. I always thought they saw and talked to God...and knew what Heaven looked like.

Anon
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When I was very young, Smoothie, our English Bulldog, was very ill with cancer. On one of many visits to the 'doggie doctor' I was left alone with my imagination in the waiting room. Since I had never met the 'doggie doctor', I sat trying to visualize him. That is when I decided if the doctors were dogs, then the cats must be nurses.

~wiser now
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When I was little a friend told me that kittens come from a cat if you plant it in the ground, so I tried to plant our cat in the ground and the cat scratched me in the face really hard.

Anon
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I used to believe...thanks to my older sister...that dogs could talk, but they just didn't talk to me, cause they didn't like me.

Jen
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I used to think that you were supposed to pat dogs and stroke cats, and that there was something unnatural or wrong about stroking a dog or patting a cat. It just didn't feel right.

Now, however, I own a weird cat who seems to like being vigorously thumped.

Love 'em both
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When I was seven, my uncle, who lived upstairs from us, brought home a puppy, which he eventually gave to my sister and me. He and my aunt said it was "part dalmatian and part travelling salesman," so for years I thought there was a breed of dog called a travelling salesman. I wondered why I never saw any reference to it anywhere. I figured it out when I was around twelve and started hearing those jokes.

C.C.
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I used to and sometimes still think, that there was people inside my dogs. That since the begining of time people hid themselves in dog outfits, I was of-course never afraid to change in front of them because all my dogs were girls, then I got a boy dog. he ran away. This theory was destroyed when my dog had puppies.

Remember Bird brain and Mousy mouth? Well I'm doggy ditz.
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I used to be afraid to let our cat sleep in my bed with me, because my brother told me that cats suck out your souls through your nose while you are sleeping. I know, I was a deeply disturbed child.

disturbed
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