body functions : farting - I Used To Believe

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Girls don't fart

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I used to think when i was a little kid that when you felt wind in your face the person in front of you farted really bad

bobert

when i was a kid i used to think farts were another person in my tummy talking and he had bad breath

JOEY

when i was little i thought that a skunk lived inside me and whenever he got pissed off he would spray causing me to fart...sadly i didn't realize it wasn't true until i was ten

skunkyfarts

I used to believe that if you farted on a cold day, steam would come out of your butt. I even tried farting in the cold and spinning around quickly to catch it.

smarthamster

When I was a kid my sister once told me that it was a sin to hold back a fart in Church. The reason she gave - concentrating on holding in the fart would distract your attention from the service, and you were supposed to give all your attention to the service. She even told me that because people are supposed to freely fart in Church whenever they get an urge to, that's why the seats are called "pews". Well, it seemed to make sense to me at the time. But by the time I had only let a few good farts in Church, I clearly found out that doing so did NOT meet with my parents' approval. I guess I then began to realize my sister had been playing with me.

Valerie

when my sister was little, she believed that when you farted it came out of your mouth and when you burped it came out of your butt...now you may not think its funny...but then it was hilarious.

Da Ching Chong

when i was a little kid, when my dad always farted he would say "there goes another barking spider." whenever he said that, i would dive on the floor looking for it.

Anon

When i was little my friends convinced me that when i heard somebody else fart that it was really me.And they told me that no body would know if i sniffed them up quickly enough.Needless to say, my friends constantly tried to fart so that could watch me turn around and sniff untill i thaught it was gone.

fart sniffer

When I was in third grade,we were taking a test and I farted and it came out soooooooo loud and it sounded strangely like a horn. Everyone turned around and looked out the window thinking that a big truck had went by and blew its horn. I turned around and went with it, because i didn't want anybody to know it was me.

Fartin' Trucker

when i was a child my father would fart and then point over to the picture frame over the couch and say there was a barking spider behind the frame!!

barking spider

When I was younger, I thought that when you farted, a little brown, smelly bubble would pop out of your butt, and then it would pop loudly. When it popped, a nasty-smelling gas would be released, and if some of the gas got on your clothing, you would smell bad forever. This resulted in: a) me looking behind myself after farting (to see the bubble) and b) me jumping as soon as I farted (so no gas got on my clothes!)

Charlie (aka FartBoy)

When I was little, I thought that it was actually my pants farting. My mom still asks me if my pants just farted.

blame it on the pants.

When I was younger, I used to believe if i covered my ears before I farted no one else would hear it.

Lime

I used to think that a queef was just a regular fart, NOT the kind of fart that cometh from a woman's inner area. When I was around 18, I had told my boyfriend at the time about how my best friend and I would go around saying "I queefed". He then asked me if I knew what it really meant. Of course I didn't know that it could mean anything else, and when I asked him what it really was, he wouldn't tell me (being that he was a little more sexually adept than I was). Anyway, I found out the true meaning when I was 21--my roomie and some friends set me straight during a discussion on bodily functions.
Rat Boy, I hate you for not telling me before!

Gassy

my brothers farts smell really bad so when i was little i always thought he pooped in his pant when he farted

kat

When i was younger (about 4 or 5) I used to believe farts were a bubble in the shape of a potato peeled by a knife due to the fact thats what it felt like when it came out. Felt like alot of angles. Man, was i stupid

Nic

my older cousin once told me that if i never farted again, all of the gas would build up inside me and i'd explode.

heather

I had always believed that if you farted, green gas would come out! and if you would breathe it in, your face would turn green! how dumb was i?

green face farter

My mom would fart and blame it on my cat Rose. I used to think Rose was the gassiest cat in the world. And I didn't realize that it wasn't my cat until I turned 15. It was when my mom was sitting by the cat and she farted and I looked over at my mom and go... "Mom, did you know that Rose only farts when she is around you?" she looked at me like I was the stupidest daughter ever!! lol I am a brunette who is blonde!!! lol

anna the shorty

I used to think that to get the gas in the natural gas trucks, people farted into the back of the truck and closed the door really quick.

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