Apparently, my mom and her friends were very ladylike. Until I was about 23 and living with my fiancee, I was utterly convinced that females were physically incapable of farting.

Jaede

I used to think they if you farted with you pants on, the fart would stay in my pants and go back up your butt, and you'd never stop farting. So I used to pull down my pants to fart.. I stopped because it got embarrassing having to run and hide at school!

Anon

I used to beleive that if you farted while running
you would run faster, So when i raced my friends
i always tried to fart.

Yvona balsacke

My grandma told me that smelling people's farts would help us grow taller. I'm pretty sure she did it for her own amusement.

Mike

When I was younger, My Dad told me if I go outside and fart in a jar then close it, I could capture it and it would glow in the dark... I tried it.

Anon

My dad used to tell me that if I farted a really stinky fart that it would burn a hole in my underwear...I used to check every time.

some fool

My father used to tell my brother that if he breathed in my father's farts, that it would make my brother grow. So when my father would cut one, my brother would run up and take big, long whiffs. Cracked dad up.

Anon

I was scared to fart outdoors in the winter when I was a kid (OK, I'm still a little self-conscious about it). When you are in the cold you can see your breath and steam comes out of your mouth. I figured the same principle applies to flatulence. How embarrassing would it be to fart outdoors in the cold and have someone see steam coming out of your butt and know that you farted?

MrVengeance

i was told in first grade that when you farted green gass or bubbles come out....so for months i tried to catch a peek when i farted....but i always missed. it came out before i got a look. i still haven't seen what a fart looks like, but adult reasoning tells me that there would be a green coloring to my underwear if this were so.

shane

When I was young I believed that if you farted when it was cold outside smoke would come out of your bootie the same way it does mouth. So when I would have to fart and I was waiting for the school bus I would hold it until I was sure that no cars were coming by so that no one would no that I pooted.

ROXY

I didn't realize till later on in my young life...I'm 14...that pets farted. One day I smelt something that was a little unusual to say the least and I was the only one in the room I finally realized that my cat had let one and was staring up at me like nothing happened...My other cat runs from his farts!!!!

.....I have discovered the truth

Everytime my dad farted he used to blame it on those damn ducks. My naive brothers and I believed my dad and everytime we heard him fart, we tried to find the ducks before they got away.

Alana

When I was about 5-6 years old, I used to think that whenever someone farted, a little invisible man came out of ur butt, made the sound, and ran around the room stinking the place up with some sprayer he had.

Anon

when i first heard about heat sensor cameras, i always thought that most shops would have the cctv camera with this built in. i would never fart in a shop incase they were looking at the heat sensor camera, and see a big patch of heat coming out of my bum, i accidentally did one once, and i kept waiting for one of the shop staff to come over to laugh and point at me!
awwwwwwwwww

lue

When I was younger I used to think that when someone said, "He is going to the gas chamber" that the "gas" was farts. I envisioned a bunch of people pressing there butts into holes in the wall and expelling gas. The gas was either bottled or the "victim" was in the room while the gas was being expelled. I now know the real meaning of the saying, but I still get a laugh out of my original thought.

Jennifer

My mom told me that she had stocked up on a "new" invention that you spray around the house and if someone farts the air around their butt turns purple and a purple cloud follows them and everyone knows they farted. I was very feminine and girly when i was younger so i was terrified that everyone would find out that i fart! lol

Courtney

When I was little i misheard the famous lines from Romeo and Juliett. I thought she was saying "Romeo, Romeo where fart thou Romeo." I was confused and thought he just had really bad gas.

Annikka

I was sitting in the car when I was about 5 and saw crumbs from potato chips all crushed up on the seat and I asked "Mummy, are they my farts?" my mother had no idea what to say...

Jane

i believed that if you farted too much in a room and you were to light a flame your house would blow up

the nuclear fart

I used to believe that when you farted little bubbles came out of our butt, so I was very careful not to fart while I was standing. Just in case.

Anon