when i was little my parents taught me to say "pardon me" when i farted. i didn't really understand, so i came up with my own logical saying. "fart on me"

maggie

When my sister and I where little we would get in bed with my mom when my dad would leave for work at 2am. Every time we would get in bed she would tell us if we farted in bed our feet would turn brown. I believed this for many years. Now I have a son of my own Im going to tell him the same thing because its so funny.

Tracy

I used to believe that when you farted little bubbles came out of our butt, so I was very careful not to fart while I was standing. Just in case.

Anon

I was told that if you just let your farts out then eventually you would not be able to sop yourself farting - I was petrified, and had horrible visions of walking down the street farting uncontrolably (teriible thought)!!!!!

Never farts unless he can (really) help it!!!

I was sitting in the car when I was about 5 and saw crumbs from potato chips all crushed up on the seat and I asked "Mummy, are they my farts?" my mother had no idea what to say...

Jane

i used to believe that stomach aches were farts stuck in sideways.

amanda p.

I used to believe that our family was the only family that farted.

Teri

When my family went camping on Labor Day weekend with another family we were friends with, I remember whenever somebody farted, one of the member's of the other family would cover their beer or drink with their hand. I thought from then on that if you didn't do this, then the fart would get into your drinks.

Wade

My schoolmate Nick used to think that girl's farts smelt of roses.

Nathan

i never knew the word fart exsisted until i was about seven, i thought it was called "bustin' a bean" 'cause that's what my dad always called it, lol

kait

To begin, you need a bit of background on my family: Dad's a lawyer, Mom's a medical researcher. And they're a bit careless with their references.

Anyway, I found a book called the Amazing Machine about the human body, and, being at the time in my machinery-fascination stage, started reading.

Then after dinnertime, I sat at the table and waited for several minutes. When Mom noticed me, she asked what I was waiting for.

To which I replied, "For someone to bring in this can of gas we're supposed to pass around after we eat."

Anon

One time my dad told me that if I fart and burp at the same time, you would implode. I tried and tried, but I couldn't do it. About six mounths later my dad told me that it wasn't true. That means I told all my friends a lie!

Anon

I remember when my sister was about 5, she would not fart in the tub. She thought that it would form a smelly-film on top of the water that would kling to every inch of your body when you were ready to get out of the tub.

Anon

As a child I believed that if I did not pull my fathers finger that he could explode. Now that I have a child of my own, I have instilled this fear in her.

Michael, Jasper IN USA

my mom told me girls shouldnt fart its not lady like. but i found it simply hilarious but every time i did it she gave me this look so once i put a air freshener in my pants and hopped she wouldn't notice.

Anon

I worked with a guy who thought that farts were microscopic pieces of poo and he was afraid he would get sick if he breathed them. He was 23!

Laughed in his face

When I was little I used to think that if you farted in the shower it wouldn't smell cos the water would wash it clean.

Anon

I was told in first grade that if you fart burp and sneeze at the same time you would blow up

bob doodle

Until I was about 9, I believed farts were actually bubbles...rather unpleasant brown bubbles, to be specific. Farts sounded different because some involved just a few big bubbles bursting loudly, while others were the result of a large number of small bubbles popping in rapid succession. These bubbles also explained why one's underwear sometimes ended up stained at the end of the day. All quite internally consistent, when you think about it.

The boy in the bubble

When I was little, I always thought that if you held a burp in, it turned into a fart; and if you held in a fart, it turned into a burp.

Shelly