When I was very small, I thought that as we got older, we went back in time. So I figured I'd get to be a gladiator when I grew up.

Jim knows better now

I thought "born of a woman" meant that you were a little girl when you were born. So in Sunday School, I thought Jesus was a girl when he was born. I asked me grandfather and my dad if they were "born of a woman" and of course they told me yes. I lived in fear of turning into a boy.

amanda

I used to believe that you slowly acquired an English accent when you got old.

Of course, my grandmother, great aunt and great uncle came to the US from England in the early 1900's, but nobody had told me this when I was five or so.

Ormewood

My birthday is February 14th, Valentine's Day, and when I was little, I thought that when I turned sixteen, instead of getting my licsence, I was going to turn into Cupid.

Brandyn

Every old person I met smelled bad, and I thought old people smelled bad because they were slowly rotting.

Jasmine

I used to think that growing up and getting taller wasn't a gradual process. I thought I'd wake up one morning and be a couple feet taller. I remember thinking how hard it would be to go to the store to buy new clothes since all my others obviously wouldn't fit me anymore. I'd wonder why, when we went shopping, I'd never seen any kids older than me wandering around the aisles wrapped in bedsheets.

Jalinnet

When I was little I didn't know what the word teenager meant. I heard it a lot on tv or when my sister's friends came over. I never once thought to ask anyone what it meant, so I came up with my own definition. According to me at age 5 a teenager was an evil person who broke into your house at night to steal your toys. How I ever got this idea, I don't know. I found out what it really meant when I was about 6 and I was watching a tv show with my sister. It was about this group of teenagers and stuff that they did...so whenever they said the word teenager I would think to myself, if the people who make this tv show know that teenagers exist, why do they let them be on tv? I mean, back then I thought stealing toys was the worst thing you could do. When I asked my sister why this was so, she couldn't stop laughing. She still makes fun of me now. On my 13th birthday, she came up to me and sed "you're a teenager now, go steal someone's toys" i hate her.

five-year old dictionary

When I was younger I used to Believe that adults were always adults, and that other kids were always their age.
in other words: I used to believe that everyone was born their age.

Anon

When I was little, I thought that if a child had a period of growing quickly, it was called a "growth sperm." Well, one of my friends came over to my house to play, and my mom mentioned to my friend that she has grown a lot since the last time she had seen her. So I blurted out, "YEAH, YOU'VE HAD A GROWTH SPERM!!!". Obviously, I later learned that it's called a growth SPURT, not sperm.

whoops

When I was very small, I thought that when you were born you were always a little girl, then you turned into a little boy, then a female, and then a male.

TopTopper

I used to think grown-ups could see what kids were thinking because kids' foreheads acted like mini tv screens, which showed whatever the kid was thinking. This was confirmed when my mom was excited about me getting my bangs cut off. I thought the adults just all knew never speak about this ability, and I made sure to think nice thoughts when adults were around. I couldn't wait to grow up.

Lati B.

My brother is just barely two years older than me. When I was around four, I got very fed up with him boasting about his age, so told him that I would catch up to him one day. So I prayed for tornado's to come on his birthday. Somehow I thought that would prevent him from turning another year older... as if it were the celebration part that makes a person turn another age. If that were the case... I think people would have stopped celebrating their birthday's long ago.
And ironically... the tornado's always came on mine.

Megan Spilker

When I was a kid I was adamant that I was not going to grow up. My parents thought it had to do with seeing the movie Peter Pan, but little did they know it was because I thought grown-ups HAD to listen to elevator music and always be serious.

Donna C.

Boys were never 16 years old - they went straight from 15 to 17. Girls made up for this by missing out on being 19 years old.

Luce

I figured that the key difference between grown-ups and kids was that grown-ups knew how to sit still. I was convinced I'd never learn how.

Jim Glass

My uncle was born on the same day as me (Feb 28) but is about 30 years older. When my mother told me about this, I imagined how much more food he had been eating to be twice as big as me but be born on the same day...

Leon

When i was little i was a really big tomboy...so i had the thought that when you grew up you would become the opposite sex(boys turn into girls and vice versa)...until i was about 6 i was extrememly disturbed that my dad used to be a girl.

cunfuzzled

When I was a kid I didn't realise that many old ladies had perms - I just thought that as women got older their hair became curly. My hair is very straight, so I used to look forward to getting old and having curly hair!

Anon

Until I was about 3 I believed that as I grew older my parents would grow younger and that I would look after them when they were little.

' Mum, when i grow big and you grow little.....'

Anon

When I was little I used to belief that my clothes shrunk systematically, instead of me growing...

Nico