When I was about 5 or 6, I used to think the song 'Beauty and the Beast' was really 'Beauty and the Beef'.

Natski

In Paul Simon's song, "Still Crazy After All These Years", I used to think the line, "And I would not be convicted by a jury of my peers" was "And I would not be caught dead wearing jewelry in my ears."

Mary Ellis

My parents used to watch a lot of All in the Family reruns when I was around 6-10 years old. This is how I heard the lyrics:

By the way glad miller played
Songs that made the hit parade,
Guys like us we had it made,
Those were the days.

And you knew where you were then,
Gals were girls and men were men.
Here's to we could use a man like Herbert Hoov'r for our den.

Didn't need no world's best date.
Everybody pulled his weight.
G.R.O. la sal-man grate.
Those were the days.

I was willing enough to belive that Herbert Hoover had been a great conversationalist, and therefore someone you'd want around your den; and it seemed reasonable that an old fart like Archie might find the modern dating scene not to his liking.
But what was a "sal-man grate"? After much thought, I came to the uneasy conclusion that it was something you put over the ducts in your house to keep out the salamanders. Later, I toyed with the idea that "Salmangrade" was some small, obscure Eastern European state, but that wasn't quite satisfying either.

Later I found out the real lyrics:

By the way Glen Miller played
Songs that made the Hit Parade,
Guys like us we had it made,
Those were the days.

And you knew who you were then,
Girls were girls and men were men.
Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.

Didn't need no welfare state.
Everybody pulled his weight.
Gee our old LaSalle ran great.
Those were the days.

JEC

I always thought the song 'goin to the chapel and we're gonna get married...' was

'WE'RE GOIN TO STAPLES AND WE'RE GONNA GET HAIRY!!!'

Amanda.W.

When I was little, the song "How Bizarre" by OMC was really popular. And I always thought he said "cruising down the freeway in my hot croissant".
I had weird images of the guy and his whole band driving a giant pastry roll thing.

Katie

Remember that Madness song "Our House"? When they said "Our house, in the middle of our street" I used to believe that the house was literally in the middle of traffic. I wondered, did the house have a big opening where cars went through and then exited through the back?

Sue

When I got Bob Dylan's Freewheelin' album (around age 9), I thought the line in Honey Just Allow Me One More Chance that goes, "I'm lookin' for a woman needs a worried man" was "I'm lookin' for a woman needs a one-eyed man".

Anna

My father, as a young boy, misunderstood some of the lyrics in Roger Millers 'King of the Road':

Actual words: 'Trailer for sale or rent...'
He heard: 'Trailer for sailorettes (as in, female sailors!)

M.

The Itsy Bitsy Spider

When I was little I used to sing that the sun dried "a ball of rain" instead of "up all the rain." duh

Briana

When I was five, thought paul McCartney was singing "stand on the rug" instead of "Band and the Run". I also though the girl "walked and talked like an ape now" (instead of ACE) on the Beach Boys song "Fun Fun Fun".

Holly

The Pink Meat Song - a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. A very small French vocabulary let me hear "le viand rose" instead of "La Vie en Rose"!

Anon

In the song, "Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds", I thought the line went : ". . . the girl with colitis goes by." instead of the correct " . . .the girl with collidoscope eyes". I had heard of people having some kind of condition called colitis; but hadn't the slightest idea what it was. I held this belief until I was well into my teens.

tim

Anon

When I was eight, I loved Madonna's "Papadompe Beach." Didn't get why she was in trouble, though....

tncatboy

For years I thought that ABC's 'when smokey sings said 'When Smokey Sings, I hear violence', thinking that smokey drove people to fighting. My brother pointed out that it's 'I hear violins'. I reckon either makes sense though. No?

minky tent

My husband turned me on to classic ACDC, and up until he heard me singing along, I thought the lyrics were:

Dirty Deeds and the Thunder Chief

It's one of his favorite "cocktail party stories."

Niki

"what a wonderful world" by Louis Armstrong still is my favourite song but I used to believe he sings "the dog says goodnight" instead of "the dark sacred night" I only discovered that last week and I am fifty years old....well never too old to learn...

cobus

When my son was 5, we were on a trip and the song A Horse With No Name by America was playing on the radio. My son was in the back seat singing "Ive been through the desert on a horse with no legs" instead of, "I've been through the desert on horse with no name"

jonnyd

This isn't mine, but my dad used to think that the lyrics to the Beach Boys song "Fun, Fun, Fun" were "We'll have fun, fun, fun 'til your daddy takes the teapot away." instead of "We'll have fun, fun, fun 'til your daddy takes the T-bird away."

Liz

What about this one?
In the song by Yes called "Owner of a lonely heart", when they come to the part where they sing:
Owner of a lonely heart!
Owner of a lonely heart!
I used to think they tried to make people steal things from the lonely people on the street by singing:
Only rob the lonely ones!
Only rob the lonely ones!

Imagine that :D

Morten Vestergaard

Ok so, the Travis Tritt song "I smell T-R-O-U-B-L-E" was a source of much confusion for me as a child. In the song he sings the title... and since I hadn't quite learned how to spell and had no concept of letters themselves, I heard "I smell pee all over you and me." ... I always wondered why I got in so much trouble for wetting my pants when grown men did it all the time ... hahaha

Em Michelle