there is a venue near my parents' home called "private dancer/adult bookstore." i always wanted to go there when i was little because it combined the two things i loved so much: dancing and books. i was taking tap lessons at the time, and thought one day i'd be able to perform there, my first step on my way to broadway. also, i was jealous of the adults who went to the "adult bookstore." i thought that meant they were books for people who were advanced readers. i couldn't wait until i was well read enough to go there. little did i know they were all picture books.

kel

My sister would always bring a lunch size bag of potato chips whenever we went to a department store. She didn't eat them herself, she would feed them to the mannequins. She believed that they came to life after the store was closed and they were relying on children to leave some food behind because adults did not know they were alive.

Little Lisa's Sister

The supermarket my mother frequented placed the Wise potato chips on the bottom shelf.
As a preschooler I used to run down the chip aisle in fear because I believed that the eye on every single bag of Wise potato chips was staring at me.
I believed that they wanted to "get me."

Anon

I used to believe that the "black market" was a physical flea market somewhere in Central America where you could buy stolen paintings and Russian tanks.

Shannon Hubbell

I used to believe that the short display beds at department stores were for dwarfs.

p

I believed when I was a child that a man lived in the Kentucky Fried Chicken bucket (on top of the sign) and he was always chasing his furniture while it kept turning.

Caro

When I was little, my dad told me that when the mall closed at night, zombies came out and ate all the people who were locked inside. It backfired, though, one night when we were still at the mall at closing time and I started freaking out.

Marian

I used to believe that the drug store sold illegal drugs. It had the word "Drug" right there on the sign!Every time I went with my parents to buy shampoo and toothpaste I would worry that we would get arrested for being there!

Anon

When I was around five, I asked my older brother where store mannequins came from; he told me that these were shoplifters that the store's boss had shot a ray at that turned them into stone, and that is why they were in such odd poses, as they were desperately running away when the ray got them- separate hand, arm, foot, and leg mannequins were grazing hits by the same ray, or when the store decided to show some mercy. I decided never to shoplift, and was in fear that I would see someone that I recognized as a mannequin someday.

Pat Flannery

When I was young, I used to really want a "lion chop" from the butcher, because I reckoned it would be cool to eat a lion. My mother used to look at me like an idiot whenever I asked her to get me one when she went to the butcher. It was only later when I was about 8 I read the sign properly and saw it actually said "loin chop". D'oh!

Stopho