ten random beliefs
I had a really smart dog, Sandy, a Sheltie. She knew when you were going to take her for a walk, recognized the words "go for a walk," and that kind of thing. She really was a great and intelligent girl. But she couldn't actually speak. That's where I was incorrect. I would spend an hour or so maybe once a week, after school, alone in the house with Sandy, pleading with her to chat with me, and often promised that I would protect her, and never let them give her a lobotomy. She held out. I'm still not convinced, though.
My mom is from Finland, and as a kid I thought it was so cool that I used to talk about it all the time to my teachers. My first grade teacher finally asked me to do a presentation on Finland, complete with drawings of reindeers and Lapp people, and everybody in my class thought that I was making it up - that there was no such place as Finland! I made my mom come in and speak Finnish to everybody, but they thought she was just jibbering and "goo-goo-gah-gahed" at me for the remainder of the school year!
I dug a hole in my backyard as a kid and found some shards of old broken dishware. I honestly believed that this is what people meant when they spoke of "digging a hole to China" and assumed I had done so.
When I was young, I used to think that Presbyterians and Pedestrians were the same thing. When my mom would drive by the hospital in our town, there was a sign that said "Pedestrian crossing" and I always wondered why they got a special crossing.
When I was little my dad always used to joke and say "Look! A flock of turtles!" Then he would quickly snatch a chip or a piece of food. I grew up actually thinking that the collective noun for turtles was a 'flock'
i used to believe that there was a tiny creature in that box with the button you press to cross at the lights, and every time you pressed the button it gave him an electric shock.
therefore i believed that pressing it heaps of times made him hurry up and change the lights
Another religious animal (see Gladys the cross-eyed bear) was that American reptile "the prairie tortoise" who always seemed to feature just before the "Our Father"
My grandma got a cat when I was about 4-5 and I figured she must have picked it up off a shelf at the grocery store, like bread or cereal. It never occurred to me that I'd never seen cats and dogs on the shelves there, it just seemed natural.
My parents used to joke that the dirt in my ears could grow fruit and I believed them. they would pretend to pull grapes and strawberries out of my ears. I would often ask them to check. When I told them that the kids in kindergarten didn't believe me they started pulling bigger and bigger fruit out of my ear to try to drop a hint. After the oranges and grapefruits didn't work, they just told me the truth. I was sooo mad and disappointed I shut myself in my room for the day.
I knew that beef came from cows and that chicken came from chickens. However, I was convinced that pork could be obtained by mixing beef and chicken together.