ten random beliefs
i used to think that the people on TV can hear you talking at home, so whenever my parents started talking about something else when the news was on i felt bad for the newsreaders, coz i thought that they knew they were being ignored.
So i would always pay really close attention to every news story and say 'mmm' knowledgeably at various intervals, right up until someone realised why i was doing it and put me straight, otherwise i would probably still be doing it now. :D
I used to believe that "exotic dancers" were girls who did choreographed dance routines with wild animals. I wanted to be one until I was like 11, when I found out that "exotic dancer" was a euphemism for stripper.
I used to believe that brains were a bunch of staples hanging on a rack in your head and when you needed to think or you touched something hot, the appropriate staple would flatten out and race down to the appropriate place, telling it what to do, i.e., "pull your hand away, quick, that's too hot!"
I used to believe that after eating vegetables, you should not drink water. Because one day, a plant will grow and flowers will flood your mouth. Lame right :P
I used to believe that people lived in the tv, so when they had boxing matches and if they missed and hit the tv, they would come through into our house
I believe my mother once told me that you had to go to a special school to learn how to be a criminal. I imagined all these kids sitting in desks learning how to rob and kill people. I also imagined they'd get homework assignments like, "Go kill someone."
When I was little, my Mum told me that when the Queen went to the toilet, a lttle brush came up and scrubbed her bum when she had finished.
However, my Mum also convinced me that she and Elvis were very good friends. After no reply to my many letters to The King, I began to doubt this..
when i was in second grade, i used to believe that adults had a slower pulse than kids. so i took my pulse, decided that it was really slow, and reasoned that i was secretly an adult in a child's body. then i would take the pulse of other kids at school, and if theirs was as slow as mine, i would tell them how they were secretly adults, just like me. most kids i told this to were fascinated. we had a little club going for a while.
When I was small I thought that my parent's car didn't move over the Earth, rather, that we kept going straight and the world turned itself to accomodate where we were going. Then I factored in that there were cars travelling in the opposite direction and ones even turning when we weren't. I was then forced to believe that the world itself was just a giant rubix cube turning and rotating itself all at once so everyone could get where they were going. Eventually I figured it out.
The first place I ever saw fireworks was Disneyland. When I saw the 4th of July fireworks in my town, I shouted "Disneyland! Disneyland's over there!" My mom tried to prove me wrong, but I was convinced that Disneyland was somehow picked up and moved into the hills in the distance where the fireworks were shot from.