i used to picture jesus as a kind of cartoon Tarzan, swinging through the trees...

bex

when i was a kid, i believed jehova witnesses were evil, because i thought that 'jehova' meant 'satan'. i was always really scared when they came to the door because they reminded me of the old man from Poltergeist.

devon

When I was small I was oneday in a airplane flying above the clouds. I asked my mother if that was where Jesus lived.

Brad

When I grew up I went to Catholic school and was taught by nuns. They constantly told us children that if we made a face and the devil passed our face would remain like that forever. It was years before we knew otherwise

Anon

I used to think that Jesus was burried in our local grave yard because there was a statue of him on one of the graves.

Kathryn

Someone once told me that 666 is the devil's number and I had this shorts which had 666 on the zipper. So for a long time I was convinced that I am the devil's son.The funny part was that if you held the zipper upwards it looked like 999 but i was convinced that it is 666 so i spend a lot of time praying that I did not want to be the devil's son.

libyh

My 4 year old cousin recently asked us if Jesus is a man or a woman. We all guessed that the long hair, the beard and the robe made him doubt on everything that he already knew about boys and girls.

Barbara

I used to picture God as a giant transparent poodle after seeing "All dogs go to heaven".

Anon

I thought God looked a little like Newman from Seinfeld

Anon

When I was young I was shopping in London with my mum and we saw the actor Robert Powell. Knowing I wouldn't know his name my mum said "Look there's Jesus!". So I did what anyone would do in Jesus' presence and got on my knees.

Anon

I used to think that Jesus was English. It made sense to me at the time because Mary and Joseph are English names. Well, Joseph is a Jewish name but he wasn't Jesus' father. God was! He isn't Jewish...Don't even look Jewish...
God is Church Of England. Her Majesty the Queen's church!

Santa Puncher

When my goldfish died we flushed it down the toilet and my mum said that it had gone to heaven. So i said God lives in heaven and she said yes. So from then on i believed that God lived down the LOO!

Anon

When i was little i used to think of God as a tall guy, dressed in red robes and a red turban(why red?) with a big nose and a real serious expression and when rain came it was God taking a shower and during a thunderstorm him and his angels were running around playing football with the Sun, that's why it's so dark. What an imagination!

Rissy -riss

When I was little and learned the Apostle's Creed, I thought "Pontius Pilate" meant an evil and insane pilot (as in "suffered under Pontius Pilate"). I got this idea because of TV commercials for the movie "North by Northwest," in which Gregory Peck was being buzzed by an airplane and running away from it. I thought some crazy pilot did the same thing to Jesus.

Anon

Not mine, but my brother's-
My young brother, when told he was a child of Jesus, began to look terrified and started to panic. When we asked what was wrong, he wailed 'No child of see-sus! I mommy's child!'

Suprisingly, our pastor was the first to laugh.

A bad big sister