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As a child, I went to a Christian school and they always told us that one day we were going to meet god. Subsequently, I thought "god" was an actual person. As in, someone we were going to meet for lunch one day. I was downtrodden to find this wasn't the case.
I was raised in an Athiest environment, so naturally, I didn't know hardly anything about the Christian religion until neighbours and classmates told me about it. When I was around 4 years old one of my older neighbours explained to me the story of Jesus Christ, saying that he was my saviour and he died on the cross for my sins. Having explained what sins were but not understanding what a cross was, I understood that somebody died on some railroad crossing trying to save me for some bad things I had done. My parents ended up laughing at how upset I got.
When i was a kid i used to think that the Holy Trinity was made up of 4 people. Father, Son, Holy and Ghost.
It sounds better in my native tongue (Portuguese)
When I was maybe 7 or 8, I used to try and imagine how big God actually was. I would try and "logically" figure out his size based on the size of cities and states. Like his hand had to be as big as California.
As a child in Sunday School, I read in the Bible that Jesus healed people with divers diseases. What the heck kind of disease could a scuba diver get? It makes a big difference when you add the letter e to divers.
i used to believe that god gave everyone the same amount of money in the beginning and all the people in poor places like africa wasted theres and all the rich people spended there wisely
I used to believe that every religous Christmas card we recieved was sent to us by God.
When I was a kid, because God lived in Heaven, I thougth all the places in the Bible were in Heaven too, imagine my astonishment when watching the TV one day and there was film footage from Bethlehem, I was stunned and couldn't figure out how they'd gotten the cameras into Heaven, much less why everyone in Heaven [actually the good people of Bethlehem] were wearing regular clothes like "real" people ...
When I was about 3 in the early '70s my mom and I were on a bus going to visit my grandpa. This hippie got on the bus who looked EXACTLY like Jesus! Not only that, but he had a T-shirt with a picture of Jesus on the front. As soon as he got on the bus I yelled, 'Look mommy, it's Jesus!' I thought it was pretty cool that Jesus was riding with us. Of course my mom was embarrassed.
when I was little I used to think that when you said the word "Godzilla you were saying God's name in vain
I used to believe that God was a hedgehog!!! Silly I know, but I was about 6!
When I was four and somewhat Christian (I didn't know anything except the basics), I thought that there were three equal and holy people; God, Jesus and Santa Claus.
The Adam and Eve story confused me a bit. I was pretty sure that if we all came from the same two people then we were inbred.
I used to believe that Jesus and all of the wise men lived under my bed.
When I was little I used to think that God looked like the KFC colonel who lived in the heaven and never slept while he watches over us. I also used to think that he always smiles...
That God was always watching you, and if you were naughty he would kill you
I thought all angels were named Harold, because of Hark, the Herald (Harold??) Angels Sing. This really confused me because my best friend's father was named Harold and he was no angel. He drank beer and used bad words.
my husband figured out when he was very small that he must be jesus. he knew that his dad's name was joseph, but never knew what his mom's name was because his dad always used to call her 'mom'. hubby figured her name must be mary, and he knew his brother couldn't be jesus because his name was frank, so, bless him, he decided that he must was jesus. i think thats soooo sweet!! his mom's name was lily, by the way!
I used to believe that there were two different pasts that everyone argued about: the dinosaur age and what happened in the bible. I heard that people argued about which one was true and which was false. Well, i knew that it had to be one or the other, because i could never imagine Jesus and a t-rex living together in harmony.
When I was really little my mother told me that Jesus was in everything. Of course, I interpreted that as meaning that he made up the mass of all things, such as the inside of the walls, and that's how he knew everything a person was doing and whether they were sinning. When I was about 7 or 8, I cut my arm on a rock, and a layer of my skin was coming off. I was really scared because I was unaware that people had "layers" of skin, and I convinced myself that I had found Jesus. I tried to peel of the rest of my skin so I could meet Him, and apologize for all my sins and that he had to live inside of me, but it was too painful and I gave up. Then I started to cry because I was worried Jesus would be mad at me because I couldn't free him from my skin.
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