I thought it was against the law not to go to church, and even more so if you were a kid. So I was deathly afraid that someone would lock up my family one day if we were discovered.

blnkfrnk

I used to believe that all nuns were bald. Something about a rite of passage for nuns was in there devotion to God they lost all there hair.....

Michelle

As a lover of animals, one time in church I was quite excited by the sermon because my mis-understanding of the minister who I swore said 'Gladly, the cross-eyed bear'

Philip

I once believed that the priest at the small country catholic church in Australia was calling apon some magical thing during the consecration of the host. Every time he said "let us pray" I thought he was calling apon "Alice spray". I had no idea who Alice was, nor why her spray might be so good, but sure hoped to have some one day.

Paul

i went to a catholic school in grade school. our church used to be between our house and my school so i used to pass by the church almost every day. one of the reasons why i loved passing by the church then was because the holy water smelled so sweet and flowery to me, i used to think it was really made that way. i would drop my rosary and my veil in it, and my hankies so i could take the scent home with me. after many years, one day i noticed it did not have the scent anymore and i told my mom.."why don't they put perfume in the holy water anymore?"..it was only then when my mother said "they never used to.." that i realized that i was the only one smelling the scent. i felt sad and happy at the sametime ..sad for losing it, and happy that i was given that small miracle while i was growing up.

aurora from manila, philippines

when we were preparing to receive our First Communion in the Catholic Church (may 8 years old) the nuns told us that if we touched the host in our mouth with our fingers,that blood would pour out of our mouths all over our white communion clothes.

Anon

Through a mental confusion of the Catholic ritual of Ash Wednesday and the bit about "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust," as a kid I thought that the first time the priest smeared those ashes on my forehead, I was gonna die.

Sean

When we went to Catholic mass when I was about 8 or 9 years old we always used to sit on the front bench. At that time we weren't 'confirmed' and so didn't go up for holy communion but we listened in on those who were. The priest at our church was an old Irish guy who'd obviously said the words so often that they merged together so for years I thought that when he put the 'host' on your tongue he said 'puddy-pram' to you. A couple of years later I learned that he actuallly said 'body of christ'.

Hutch

I remember I got told in church that were all part of God's family. I spent years believing my best friends and the other kids at school were really my brothers and sisters.

Erin Jones

I used to think that my dad was jesus, because he looked like the traditional brown bearded, blue eyed illustration of him. but I also kind of though that he was the devil because he didn't come to church with me and my mum. It was ver confusing.

Anon

By second grade I had learned about the chosen people, the Jews of biblical times. I had never heard the term in a contemporary context so when a little girl my age, a neighbor of my grandmother, told me she was a Jew, I remember being absolutely amazed and delighted. I had assumed they no longer existed, as if in another era they had mysteriously become extinct like dinosaurs.

Isabel

Because I was so short, I couldn't see the altar boys at Mass. I though that
the host itself made the little ringing bell noise when the priest held it up.

Monique

When I asked my grandmother what happened to the money we put in the collection plate at church, she said it "was for God." I interpreted this literally, but added a childish fantastic twist to the concept, and believed that every so often God would send a flying ship called "The Ship of Zion" (I have no idea why it was called that) to collect the money and take it to heaven. This still struck me as odd, because supposedly heaven's streets were paved with gold...

Anon

We were not required to attend school during the three summer months, so I assumed that church worked the same way. All through May and June, I kept wondering which Sunday would be the last before our summer vacation from church services. But graduation day never came.

Tom

Once we went to church we were going to give money when they passed around the collection box. I cried and sceamed so bad because I wanted the money my selfe.
I didnt really understand the whole thing of shearing!

Tim_Norway