In Catholic church as a kid, when everyone shook hands and said, "Peace be with you", I believed they were saying "Pleased to meet you". So that's what I said until my dad corrected me. Opps.

Anon

i was brought up a roman catholic and so i worshipped god. but this made me believe that anyone who was not a catholic actually worshipped the devil.

mark lanegan

I was told that if your ever swore in church, as you walked out God would strike you with a bolt of lightning.

Lou

Actually - I had this belief up until I was 20...

You know those bumper stickers that say "My boss is a Jewish Carpenter"? Well, I could never figure out why there were so many carpenters in the world, but why it took so long to build things. I also couldn't figure out why they just didn't say, "I'm a carpenter". I also had thoughts of "Big deal! My boss is a sadistic workaholic!"

Boy I felt like an idiot when I figured it out!

Surprisingly not a heathen...

When i was little and at church the precher would mention your soul...i always saw it as a golden block that was in the middle of your chest and it shone brighter if you did something good and got duller when you did something bad...i also thought that bad doctors who worked for the Devil could steal it if you had surgery....the last part i have no idea how that came about....

Jess

A friend of mine recently told me of her first church experience:

When everything was over the pastor was walking around talking to the people and he came upon Anna, who was at the time very young. He found out that it was her first ever time to church.

Pastor: How did you like the service?

Anna: The music was nice, but the commercials were too long.

Lyss

My sister once asked me why is a nun calle "the bride of Jesus" and since there are lots of nuns, not only one, does it mean that Jesus keeps a harem.

Annie

I used to think that Jesus himself was buried in the altar at my Catholic Church. I guess i thought this because i never went to any other church, and i thought mine was the one.

Scatman

that God lives in the roof of our church and makes electricity to light the chandeliers

M

When I was a teenager, I asked my friend what religion she was (she had recently moved from Pakistan to Canada). She told me "Ismaili", but, not having heard of that religion before, I heard "Smiley". I rsponded, "That's so cute!" In retrospect, that came off condescending and horrible, and I'm terribly embarrassed. I sincerely hope she doesn't remember.

Naive about world religions

Well, I'm Catholic, and I went to a private school. On Ash Wednesday, when the priest rubs some ashes on your forehead at church at the beginning of Lent, I used to think the ashes were like still on fire and burning, and that it would burn into your forehead and skull permanently and hurt. I think I was around 5 or 6, and I remember running out of the church when it was my turn to be next in line.

One a side note I also thought most people in the world were one religion.

Anon

I used to go to a catholic church when I was younger, and when they would pass out the baskets to take up the money, when they where done, they would go down the center isle that was closed from people going inside.

When the doors closed I thought inside was a giant machine with all these mechanical objects that buzzed, blinked and whirred , that would teleport all the money to heaven for god. The way the money got to his is by a giant light that carried the money all the way up.

Hazake

As a young child attending Catholic church, I noticed that at the non-Catholic church down the street, two men would roll out a heavily-weighted sign to the middle of the road on Sunday. I thought the sign said "Stop for Protestants". Later, when my reading skills improved, I realized the sign said "Stop for Pedestrians".

Jerry

When I was little and was getting my first communion, they told me Jesus was in the tabernacle (the thing behind the altar where they keep the hoast) little did I know they ment the host was in it, for years I thought Jesus was alive and they were hiding him in there.

Mary

i was raised a jehovah's witness and therefore never celebrated holidays. my parents were very vague on their reasoning for this and never really explained it to me that well, so i had the idea that christmas was actually a day that christians worshipped the devil on accident (he tricked them into it). one day i was visiting my cousin and she had a baby doll that i wanted to play with but she wouldnt let me and said it was because she just got it for christmas. i then FLIPPED OUT screaming and crying that she had to throw it away because "satan tricked her and hid a demon in it".

tatamara

I hated church. My uncle had me (and my cousins) to believe that, on Easter day, the Easter Bunnies leave chocolate and sweets all over the garden, just for us kids, if we were good and if we went to church regularly, and especially on Easter day. If we didn't go to church on that day, they would be so scared of being seen flying around (yes, they flew high in the sky on that day) they would left nothing for us.

After my parents told me Santa was dead, to spare me the pain that he never existed, I had my doubts about the existence of flying bunnies leaving chocolate presents in our garden.

I eventually found the chocolates, carefuly hidden in a wardrobe, and put them all under my bed. Then I watched the adults looking for those chocolates the rest of that day. My brother and my cousins never forgave me.

Oli.

Because I was so short, I couldn't see the altar boys at Mass. I though that
the host itself made the little ringing bell noise when the priest held it up.

Monique

when we were preparing to receive our First Communion in the Catholic Church (may 8 years old) the nuns told us that if we touched the host in our mouth with our fingers,that blood would pour out of our mouths all over our white communion clothes.

Anon

I once believed that the priest at the small country catholic church in Australia was calling apon some magical thing during the consecration of the host. Every time he said "let us pray" I thought he was calling apon "Alice spray". I had no idea who Alice was, nor why her spray might be so good, but sure hoped to have some one day.

Paul

I thought it was against the law not to go to church, and even more so if you were a kid. So I was deathly afraid that someone would lock up my family one day if we were discovered.

blnkfrnk