When I was little, I thought the hymn that goes, "Hosanna in the highest heaven...' meant someone called Hosanna (because the name is like Rosanna) was a woman in heaven who is like an agony aunt who when you go to confession helps you sort out your problems!

Natski

when i was in junior school (in the uk - 7 to 11) we used to sing hymns every morning, and this one hymn drove me mad, everyone else *loved* it, but i'm partailly deaf so i couldn't always work out what was being sung, infact i was given some of the hymns on paper so i could sing along. but this one i wasn't given, so i had no idea what was being sung, and the fact that everyone loved it so much annoyed me even more... it was the hymn that goes "hand me down my silver trumpet lord" - i used to think it was "garbrielle my silver trophic lord" and i was like "what the HELL is a silver trophic lord?!"

padfoot

In the Catholic mass, there is a part where the priest or soloist sings: "hosanna in the highest, hosanna in the highest, blessed is he...etc. etc."

I used to think they were singing "Lasagna in the highest". We are solidly Irish, but there are a lot of Italians married in, and I fondly remember many St'Joseph's feasts at the parish hall as far back as I can remember. If you don't know what St. Joseph's feast is, then you certainly have not spent much quality time around Italians.

I told my father about the belief many times, and he does not believe me to this day.

TIPScommissar

the words in "silent night" are "'round [as in around] yon virgin." i thought they were "round young virgin," because she was fat! i sang it that way for many years, and sometimes still do when i forget myself.

Anon

When my school sang 'We Three Kings' in our Nativity play I thought the first line was 'We Three Kings of Ori and Tar' and thought that Ori and Tar were countries, and spent hours searching for them on my globe...

Erin

One Easter Sunday, when my little brother was young, we went to Mass. At the point where we sing Amen, my brother wanted to participate. He started singing at the top of his lungs "Goblin, Goblin, Goblin!"

more religious than him

In the Christmas song silent night, the part that says, "'Round young Virgin..." I used to think that it was, "Round Jonh Virgin." So in Sunday School one morning when the teacher asked us to draw a poicture that rlates to the song I drew a little round man.

Ann

My younger brother, now 12, always thought that the Christmas carol went, "The first noll, the first noll..." Nevermind that it has no meaning, he believes it to this day...

Anon

At my church they would sing all these hymns and being from the South you couldnt always understand what everyone was saying.

They sang one song called "Not by Might" It went something like this...

Not by Might. Not by Might.
But by my spirit saith the Lord.

However I would loudly sing every sunday morning...

Not my pie. Not my pie.
But its the spirt's and the Lord's.

And then there was the southern oldie called "When the Roll is called up younder..Ill be there!!" which I thought was "When the ROAD is called a Punder...Ill be there!!" I couldnt figure out why people would start calling roads punders and why in the heck would I want to be there?

clynn

At my old church we sang alot of hyms.. and there was one that said "and now, let the weak say i am strong, let the poor say i am rich because of what the Lord has done"..

But seeing as i couldn't read thien and had to learn the songs by ear, i sang the lyrics as "and now, let teh wheet say i am strong, let the corn say i am rich".. i new that in the old days they ran farms alot but i never got why the farmer's crops talked to them..

Doblica W.

I wasn't helped by attending the funeral of a wealthy man who had chosen "Guide me, O thou great Redeemer." The order of service contained a misprint (accidental or otherwise) which replaced "Land me safe on Canaan's side" with "Land my safe on Canaan's side."

Anon

Like many people, I believed the song 'Lord of the Dance' said "I am the lord of the dance settee," rather than "I am the lord of the dance said he." I had images of people getting up and boogying on this settee. Which, due to childish word connections, happened to be our grey and black settee.

Rachel

For months my younger brother went around asking everyone what a "looya" was. He kept insisting he had learned a song at school about a girl named "Glori" that "had a looya". It wasn't until he sang the song that we realized he was singing "Glory, glory Hallelujah". That was about 10 years ago, but we still tease him for it.

NG

My mum said that when I used to sing "noahs arc" at school I would sing "who built the arc, no one, no one"

Clare

My sister used to think the words to the Christmas song "Little Donkey" were "Got a teapot, plodding onwards" instead of "got to keep on, plodding onwards"!

DJ