religion : hymns - I Used To Believe

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I was convinced that the hymn 'Lord of the Dance' contained the lyrics 'Don Sept, whoever he may be, I am the Lord of the Dance said he' and pictured a Pied Piper type character leading children dancing all over the hills as he played a recorder. This persisted until I reached the Juniors and we were given our own hymn books... I still picture him thus!

Sarah K

When I was in pre-school, me and my best friend were taught the song "Up from the Grave He Arose"
I, not having the best hearing, thought that the line went " Up from the Gravy he arose-something about mashed potatoes

what

My sis used to love lasagna. When we went to church, we would sing "Hosanna in the highest" but with my sister's love for lasagna she thought it was "Lasagna in the highest". She actually never found out till the third grade.

Becca

My mother was raised Catholic at a time when the mass was still conducted in Latin, and picked up a rather garbled half-understanding of the language. So, at Christmastime, when everyone was singing "Adeste Fideles," she was absolutely convinced that "Venite adoremus" ("O come let us adore him") meant "Here comes the dormouse."

Marianne

There's a song called "Take It All" by a group called Hillsongs United. A friend and I were singing this song in the car the other day. One of the lines is "Jesus, we're living for your name; we'll never be ashamed of you.... Our praise, and all we are today.... Take, take, take it all! Take, take, take it all!!"
Well, my mom was driving, and she turned around in her seat to stare at us and gave us this "WTF???" look.

Turns out that she'd misheard "take it all" as "Take, take, take it OFF!!!" My friend and I laughed so hard that we cried. Poor Mom...

Taylor

I didn't have this idea, but some of my friends did. I'm Polish and for Holy Communion we learnt a hymn that ends with words "Jemu chwala i czesc" which means "Glory to Him and honor (to Him)". But in slang, especially kids slang but not only, "i czesc" means also end of discussion, kind of like saying "period." at the end of sentence. My friends thought the hymn meant "Glory to Him, period."

My grandparents have always attended a very traditional church, where they sing a lot of old hymns. One of the hymns they sing every week is "Gloria Patri" (or something like that), and when I was little, I read that in the bulletin, and was convinced that a woman named Gloria was going to speak in church that week. (I was always puzzled as to why her name was in the bulletin, but I never heard her preach)

Anon

At church we sang a hymn with the refrain, "Sing praises to His name, He forgets not His own." For the life of me, I couldn't figure out why I was being asked to praise God simply for remembering His own name.

Lance

There's a line in a school hymn that goes 'I wait with baited breath' - I thought that meant the hymn writer's breath smelled of maggots.

Scribbles

I used to think there was a place called Orientar, where the Three Kings came from. According to the Christmas Carol!

Confused caroler

In school we had to sing "Jesus riding on a donkey." My brother, then four or five years old, came home proudly singing it...

Except that he thought Jesus was riding on a DOGGIE.

silverstar1809

when i was younger my favorite church hyme was "Victory in Jesus" because i thought it said "he socked me and bopped me" instead of "he sought me and bought me".

Samantha

I went to a church school and from the age of 4 was convinced the words of the hymn "All things Bright and beautiful" were followed by the line "All creatures stuffed with straw" I think its possibly due to early childhood visits to a local taxidermy museum...... what were my parents thinking of! Still dont know what comes next.

My husband used to believe that Joy to the World contained the lyrics 'let Earth receive her keys" instead of "let Earth receive her King"

RiRi

A friend of mine spent a lot of time in church as a child. The hymn lyrics were displayed with an over-head projector. As the pages were swapped, a huge hand appeared mid-air. Logically, she assumed this was the hand of God.

SuzieQ

I used to think the words to "Silent Night Holy Night" at the end, were "Christ the Savior is bored." It's "Christ the Savor is born."

Lydia from Los Angeles

I misheard "Bringing in the Sheaves" as "Bringing in the Sheep". It was in an episode of The Simpsons. Since there are a lot of metaphors in the Bible involving sheep, I did not pay it much thought.

And my brother also misheard it like this, so we would go around singing it like that.

Scandia

This was actually my friend's belief, but I had to put it. He went to church every Sunday as a child, and they would sometimes sing the song "Gladly the Cross-eyed Bear", which he supposed was a song about a bear named Gladly who had eye problems. It wasn't until later that he realized the song was "Gladly the Cross I'd Bear"

Mercedes

We used to sing a song in sabbath school called "I'm glad I brought my offering". I instead always sang "I'm glad I brought my orphan ring"

Katie

At Vacation Bible School one year, we had to sing a song called "Put on the Whole Armor of God". My friend, for the whole first day, thought the song went "Poot (like fart) on! Poot on! Poot on the whole armor of God, of God!" She finally figured out that those weren't the real lyrics, but we decided to tell my sister they were. She actually went the entire VBS singing that song that way...

Gotta love my friend...

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