When I was in Primary School I had a teacher that all of knew didn't like kids or for that matter being a teacher. One day he came in and said: hand up all the Catholics in the class(3 x put a hand up) and he told us 8 year olds that we were to blame for all the murders and killings in Northern Ireland. I went home from my school in Australia and asked my parents when the Hell were they in Ireland and why had they never told ME that they had traveled abroad let alone murdered people for nothing. This same teacher's measurement class involved him coming and slamming books down saying "there are 12 inches in a foot" Later he just said" "there are three feet in a yard" and i spent a whole weekend pacing out our back-yard trying to work the statement out because there was definitely MORE than three foot(lengths) in my yard alone - let alone the houses with biogger yards!!! I even tried wearing my father's shoes when measuring things out as the teacher's calculations might have been done with 'grown-ups' shoes on

meg

My 7th grade teacher...he looked like Santa. he had a button nose, and a white beard, but he was thin. we called him the "anorexic santa claus" and he danced around when people got good grades and said words that seemed friendly to children, not so friendly to older people like us...he once made a mistake and when pointed out, said "Oh, I'm a naughty boy!" and always asked for our phone numbers (to call our parents...i think he was at&t obsessed)

from then on we decided that he was a sexual predator santa and we all tried to steer clear.

I'M STILL HAVING NIGHTMARES!!!

This how I imagine substitute teaching working:
The sick teacher would be lying in his/her bed like they were dying. The principle would be at their bedside. The teacher would say, "Please, have (insert name of substitute here) teach my class today" and then die or go to sleep or something

MaryKate,12, Connecticut

In kindergarten our teacher would select one student every day to take the attendance sheet to the principal's office. For the first two months of kindergarten I refused to do it, because I was afraid the principal would come out of his office and fire me from school.

Anon

There were a bunch of boys in my second grade class who figured out that you could touch their eyeballs with their fingers. My teacher didn't like it because of germs so she told them if you accidently hit the black middle part of your eye it would pop out. I believed it until I was about 14.

Kaelyn

when i was in elementry school, me and my friends would go to the main hall for assembly.
but all the time the principal was talking we was looking at the air vent above him. now, im the air vent must have been two slits in the brick behind letting in sunlight, but as the rest of the vent was dark, it looked just like a pair of eyes.
we were petrified for years that one day we would go to school and the "eyes" would come out and get us. we spend every day trying to think of what terrible monster the eyes could have belonged to, but noone dared to have a look on their own.

as you can imagine, no teacher believed us.
they probably knew and was hiding the secret from us. well, they didnt want our advice, so let 'em be eaten! ]:) teehee :)

rennie-woo (the-monster-eye-spotter-!)

I had this really awful kindergarten teacher. I mean, she was just dreadful, so to most people, it came as no surprise when she was fired the next year. My peers and I, however, thought that she had died and was now a ghost that lived in the attic of our school (it used to be a house), and looked down at us through the ceiling lights. It made sense at the time, seeing as no one was allowed into the attic, and until forth grade, my classmates and I were terribly scared of the ceiling lights.

Anon

whenever i was mad at one of my teachers i'd draw pictures of them puking and shitting all over the place because that was the most humiliating thing i could imagine, and for some reason i believed that my drawing this would make it happen for real.

SJ

When I first started secondary school, our form teacher introduced us to our Head of Year, and told us that as long as you kept on the right side of him he was fine, but he could get rather awkward if you got on the wrong side of him. I was 11 then, and even at that age I thought that meant he preferred you to walk on his right-hand or left-hand side!

Alan, Sheffield

I used to think teachers really did have eyes at the back of their heads.

Kit

i used to and kind of still fear that teachers can read minds. i cursed at teachers in my head all the time, and sometimes they gave me this look like i actually said it to them, but they were trying to hide their mind reading powers so they couldn't yell at me or i would find out.

that'd suck.

I'm visually impaired, so when I was in second grade, and I moved from the school for the blind to a regular public school, I had a teacher called a vision teacher that worked with me on braille. One day when I was in class and one of the kids heard her called my "vision teacher," she asked her, "Are you teaching Jessie how to see?"

keyboardplayer

I used to think the nuns at school were Daleks. You could never see their legs when they walked along the corridors so they seemed to drift like real Daleks. I used to attack them on sight. Eventually (when I was 6) I got hauled off to see an educational psychiatrist because during art classes I just used to draw rows and rows of dozens of short vertical lines with a black crayon. When the teacher asked what it was I kept drawing I said "It's an army of nuns coming to get me.".

Ian Steele

I thought when we had quiet time in class, the teachers all went to the teachers' lounge and played naked pattycake.

monoglot