When I saw ads for toys that said "batteries not included" I thought it meant that the toy didn't need batteries to work. When I asked my parents for a toy I would ad "batteries not included" as a selling point, becuase then they wouldn't have to buy batteries.

Anon (from kids : toys)

When my son was little, he told me that he knew why we buried dead people .... then he carefully explained ..... 'so we don't trip over them.'

Squeak (from death : people)

I used to believe that a man actually married beer once. I wasn't sure how it could happen but I imagined a church ceremony and a bottle of beer with a little veil on it.

Kimberly (from grown-ups : marriage)

When I was about 7, my Mom sat me down and told me that she was the one putting
money under my pillow whenever I lost a tooth. For the next 2 or 3 years, I
actually believed she was the toothfairy, and was constantly trying to figure out
how she found the time to give money to every kid that lost a tooth, and also, if she
had access to so much money, why were we still living in a little apartment?

Jemyjack (from make-believe : fairies)

that when a police officer was arresting a criminal and read them their rights, when they said anything can and will be used against you.. I thought that if you said crabs or alligators or spiders... they could use them to torture you on the witness stand.

Amanda Renee (from the law : criminals)

I used to believe that if i tried really hard i could make my head explode.

not that i ever tried.

i'm not sure why i believed this.

tchin (from body functions : special powers)

As a ploy to keep us from putting small rubber toys in our mouths, our parents told us that toys were made out of boogies. I imagined a toy factory, where the workers picked their noses...

kim e (from kids : toys)

when I was about 6 or 7 yrs old I used to believe a little penguin lived in my refrigerator and his job was to turn the interior light on and off. I would sit and open the fridge repeatedly trying to catch him in the act. Boy, what a dork I was.

Bee (from at home : around the house)

My older cousin once told me that the bubbly part on the pizza, next to the crust, was the pizza's brain. I thought the pizza would be upset with me if I ate its brain, so I never ate that part.

Jennie (from food : nasty food)

I used to believe that if I wanted a certain new toy all I had to do was find something that was the same color as the toy I wanted and throw it in front of the lawn mower when my dad mowed the lawn. He would mow over it and the new toy I wanted would pop out the back of the lawn mower.
My dad used to yell at me everytime I tried to throw something in the path of the lawn mower.

mike (from kids : toys)

As a kid I was always very impressed with people in Quebec who had such well trained dogs. After all, it has to be doubly difficult to teach a dog to obey commands in a foreign language such as French. I was also a bit jealous that the dogs understood more French than I did. (I was about 11 when I figured that one out.)

mags (from animals : cats & dogs)

Remember when Rice Crispies always used to have a black crispy in the packet, (by accident but it was always there). I used to believe that if I ate the bad one beofre all the good ones I would gain super powers like supergirl.
I once even tried to fly accross the landing believing that I had achieved my goal.

Better not say (seriously disturbed from the fall) (from body functions : special powers)

I thought Napoleon invented linoleum.

Steve Murphy (from at home : around the house)

When I was six, my parents decided it was time to tell me the truth about The Easter Bunny.They said my father was the Easter Bunny, and I took it literally.
I went around for almost a week asking how he could get around the whole world in one night.

Kozel (from make-believe : easter bunny)

When I was small, I believed that if you ran the hoover over the power cord, or if you didn't keep the machine moving at all times, it would explode.

I insist that my mother told me these things; she denies it.

Craig Zerouni (from science : technology)

The actor, Lee Majors, better known perhaps as 'The Six Million Dollar Man' was my idol. As a four year old I believed that I too had bioic powers and could out-run cars, leap tall buildings, etc.

My poor mother was shocked to find me crouched on top of the kitchen cabinets one day preparing to leap to the floor. She scolded me, telling me that I shouldn't do things like that as I could get hurt. I promptly reminded her of my invincibility saying, "Don't worry mom, I'm bionic!"

Shannon (from body functions : special powers)

When one of my pets would die my mother would tell me it ran away so I wouldn't feel bad. I actually believed that all my pets ran away until I was about 19 when she told me the truth about all the pets I ever had.

Tiffany (from death : animals)

As a kid, I used to believe that technology would advance rapidly and creat a machine that would enable us to watch our dogs thoughts and memories on a monitor like a movie. I was really worried my parents would find out about all the "bad" things I had done when they weren't there (but the dog was...)

guilty (from animals : cats & dogs)

When I was fairly young; about seven or thereabouts, I wanted so desperately to be a super-hero that I convinced myself that I could "see" heat, and that since no one else mentioned this amazing feat, I alone possessed this ability. I would run around telling people "Don't touch that, it's hot--I CAN TELL!" Turns out it was just steam, and everyone was just humouring me. Go figure.

Goon (from body functions : special powers)

when i was six i had and imaginary friend named mr. lipstick man and he was a little spider who lived in the keyhole of my front door. he wore a top hat and had big red lips. i spent hours sitting three inches away from the lock talking to him and his brother.
his brother was mr. robin face, the miniature bird who lived in my mailbox.

Sylvie (from make-believe : imaginary friends)