I was told the "facts" of life by a mother who believed that if I was told about sex, I would immediately take up the hobby (at the ripe old of 9, if I remember right) so my introduction to the subject was sketchy at best. Until I was well into high school, I believed that, just as a woman ovulated every so many days, a man only got an erection once every so many days as well. So, I did the math: if I ovulated once every, say, 30 days, and my future husband (heaven forfend I have premarital sex!) would get an erection once every 20 days, our "paths would cross" every 60 days; ergo, we could only have sex once every three months and each intercourse would result in pregnancy.

Susan

I thought that if a black man and a white woman (or reverse) had a baby it would be stripped!

Bec

I must had heard wrongly at dinner conversations when I had started to believe that the eggs packed and sold in our tiny farm were laid by my mother and sisters. My nanny had even told me she was too old to lay eggs. My older brother had told me people bought them to have babies. So what about the eggs we ate - he had invented theories about several mechanisms used to differentiate between edible and child bearing eggs. One dinner I insisted so believing they were all denying, in conspiracy to hide this secret from me. My brother denied having told me anything.
So, at about six years of age, I agreed and my father woke me up early the next morning to watch the chicken lay eggs.

silly me

I belived that children were a gift from God. Therefore, I also belived that God hated my neighbor, Betty, because she had a baby every year and after each birth she would state,"if I have another child it will kill me."

Katheryn Mathews

When I was really little and starting asking my mother where babies came from she told me they came from dust. I came up the stairs one day and my mother was vacuuming under her bed. I started screaming and crying because I thought she was killing bunches of babies.

Sharon O'Neil

we used to tell my younger brother that if you ate watermelon seeds then a watermelon would grow in your stomach so he figured to grow a baby in your stomach you had to eat baby seeds.

Anon

I used to believe that when my stomach growled I was pregnant with kittens and I could hear them purring!

Angie

I had a very sophisticated idea of how babies got here when I was 7.

Every baby starts as a vegetable. You can tell what veggie people's mommies' ate to get them by what they looked like. I had been a string bean and other people were peas and others yet carrots and celery, etc. This only happens when the mommy eats the vegetable and is in love with a daddy and they decide they want a baby.

And I proceded to tell everyone who'd listen and one evening took all my 16 year old sister's male friends one by one in private and told them exactly how they came to be. Needless to say, she was mortified. What veggie were YOU?

The ironic thing is I always hated vegetables. lol

Autumnquest

In first grade, our teacher asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up, and I said a mom. Then one of my classmates said, "eeww! You're going to have sex!". I replied, "You don't have to have sex to be a mom. You can just go get a baby from the hospital. That's where everyone gets theirs."

Rhonda

I used to believe that babies were born wearing clothes - a red top and denim shorts.

Anon

My dad was stationed in Thailand during Vietnam, and when he came back, he had a photograph of himself holding a blonde monkey. He told me that I looked just like the monkey when I was a baby, so until I was 9 or 10, I believed that we were all born monkeys, then turned human when we got older.

Kristen

when my mom was pregnant with my younger sister, I asked her if she would come out naked. She said Yes and I told her to swallow some underwear so she wouldn't be seen naked.

garcia b

I used to believe that babies were bought from shops, and that when my parents told everybody that I was eight pounds three, they meant that was how much they paid for me. I believed that until I was about 7 or 8. Yes, I'm still a muppet!

Shezza

i used to believe that only humans got pregnant by having sex. sheep just magically became pregnant.

Lucy

Babies were delivered in a suitcase-not by a stork, that would be too dangerous!
Until I was 6 I thought the mid-wife brought the baby in her big bag and the mother just got fat because she wouldn't have time to cook or eat.

Anon

When I got kissed by a boy the first time (at 8 years old) I didn't know you had to have sex to get pregnant. My mom was pregnant with my brother then, and so I figured that was how she got pregnant. So, for weeks and weeks I worried that my belly was going to pooch out like hers and that she would know a boy had kissed me! It wasn't until I asked her how many times you had to kiss a boy before you got pregnant that she explained the *real* birds and bees to me!

Angela

When people talk about sex, they call it "The Birds and the Bees". As a little kid, I was very confused. How could two animals of different species have babies?

Jessica Tinch

I was around 8 or 9. My mother was pregnant and I had questions! My Dad was doing the best he could explaining everything but he couldn't quite bring himself to tell how the sperm got from the man to the woman.

So, after MANY sessions going into all the anatomical stuff on each side and all the gestational stuff about the baby's progress, I finally got a little impatient and asked the crucial question.

"Dad, I understand all this stuff but HOW DOES THE SPERM GET FROM THE MAN TO THE WOMAN?"

My Dad wasn't generally a smoker but whenever we'd have one of these sessions, he was smoking. After this question he took a drag on that cigarette that consumed about half of it in one go. He said,"Well you know the man and the woman sleep in the same bed and sometimes they roll over on each other ACCIDENTALLY!" He totally ran for cover!

I still smile about this 50 years later.

BK

When i started at school as a five year old I was very precocious as I could already read well etc. I had read all about sex and so proceeded to tell all the otyher kids how babies were made. Although it was the truth not a single one believed me and my friend Martin told me there was no way his mum would have let his dad do anything like that.

hirudo

When I was little, I thought when you had a baby shower, a mother got into a shower while she was pregnant. Then everyone would wait till she came out then clap.

Anon