I was in a restaurant on my birthday with my husband and two samall boy, it was my birthday, a few days before christmas. There was loud music playing and the place was full. My 6 yr old son wanted the toilet, so my husband took him. When he came out we were eating and he was trying to tell me something, i couldnt hear because the music was very loud, all i could hear was something about dad buying chewing gum. When the music stopped i asked him to repeat it.... he shouted..." I didnt think dad liked chewing gum...but hes just bought some from the machine in the toilets!"...the whole place heard him, needless to say i was on the floor laughing...as were everyone else!.. kids!

TT

For some reason, as a little boy, I got it in my head that semen was blue. One day in the school yard a bunch of us were talking about sex and who we liked. I liked a girl named Jenny. So, trying to be cool, I said, "I want to shoot my blue jizz all over Jenny." You'll never see five 5th grade boys with more vacant looks.

Johnny

As a young child, I understood what sex was, and also understood that there were gay men. However, I couldn't make the connection of how gay men had sex, since neither of them had a vagina. I finally concluded that they rubbed their penises together really fast, like you would with two sticks trying to make a fire.

Anon

when i was babysitting for the boy next door he started to talk about sex and how his dog got the dog next door pregnant, when i asked him what sex was he said "its when you get naked" he thought the dogs had taken thier collars of together!

Suzi

When I first heard about homosexuality I was told that you "just wake up one day and you were gay." I couldn't sleep for 3 days worrying about this.

Art

when i was 10 i asked my parents if i could watch dick tracy, she said yes.

When she heard noises comng through the kitchen hatch she questioned me as to what i was watching.

I was actually watching tracy dick (a porno). I will never look at a washing up brush the same!!!

nutty bird

When I was about nine i asked my dad what porn was and he told me that it was a vegetable. I was so confused why my older brother kept searching my dads room for magazines of vegetables

Adam

When I was 8 or 9 I was already pretty wise. I knew for example what position 69 was and how it was done. But I didn't know why it was called 69.

I used to believe that somewhere in the process of growing up you would be taught let's say 100 positions and everybody knew them. So that you could switch from 69 to 83 and then back to 14 and so on, and so on..

It took me many years to find out why position 69 is called that way

Sex Ed

I used to believe that having sex was a mom and a dad arguing. My brothers (I have 2 older ones) used to tease me mercilessly about my parents having sex the night before and I could never understand it because my room was next to theirs and the only thing I had heard was moaning...no yelling or screaming. Woke my parents up real great one time when we had a house full of company and my mom yelled at one of my brothers and there I was saying, there she goes, having SEX again.

a bit confused

I used to believe that there was a test for sex...on your driver's license is printed SEX and on my mom's it said F. I thought she must have failed SEX.

alv

When I was in 1st grade, everyone thought that a french kiss was when someone kissed your hand.
So when a boy at school told me to close my eyes and kissed my hand, I thought that he had "french-kissed" me.
When my mom came to get me from daycare that day, I told her "Mommy a boy french-kissed me today"
You can imagine her reaction.

Miranda

Around 4 years Old I asked my mom THE question (What is sex?). To avoid having to explain the whole birds and the bees concept to such a young mind she simply put it off as "It's something that mommies and daddies do". This answer suited me just fine and I went along my way, though somewhere along the line I started thinking that "sex" was just another name for "kissing" since I seen MY mommy and daddy do that all the time.

Imagine my mom & dad's shock when I came home in kidnergarten and announced, "OoOoh!! I had sex today on the bus with Rusty and I think everyone saw me!!"

Krissie

when i was young, about third grade, my (older) friend taught me about sex and said that it only worked when you were married. i thought that when my parents went to sleep, their private parts did... that. i decided not to tell them since it might scare them... they seemed too innocent to know about a dirty thing like that.

not your friend

i used to believe that porn was a religon.

Karen

when I was young, about 7 years old, I took out the trash. As a little boy, i was interested in anything electronic. There was a flashlight on the top of the trash. I took it to my mom and I asked her why she tossed out the flashlight when I could fix it. She told me they didn't make batteries for this kind of flashlight any more. I asked her if I could keep it and play with it, since it was shaped kind of like a rocket ship. She told me "no" and proceeded to toss it away herself. It wasn't until years later I found out it was a vibrator.

Repairman in the dark

when i was little... i was watching the news and i heard the word 'raped'. i asked my mom and she gave me a very hurried and vague description that was basically when someone was doing something you didn't like and wouldn't stop.
later that night, my dad was tickling me and i screamed "stop!!! stop!! your raping me!!"
luckily we were in our own house. my dad immediately stopped and didn't talk to me the rest of the day and i think then my mom described what it was and i was completely embarassed.

feeling stupid and blushing

When I was in the 6th grade I heard my sister talking about catching some guy watching her and her friend and masturbating in his car to a magazine. I thought that "masturbating" was like comparing with envy, or coveting (the reason I thought it was bad). Several months later I decided to impress my family members with my vocabulary by telling them I felt like I was masturbating over another girl's cello because I was tired of the violin. Needless to say, they corrected me quickly.

anon

When I was about 8 I heard about masturbation for the first time from my friend's older brother and his friend (they were about 14). They were talking about semen saying it was really really sticky, like super-glue. One of them said that if you get it on your hands it would stick them together and you'd never be able to get them apart. I was petrified. I believed this for years.

Mux

When I was little... we passed a sign that said "dolls, dolls, dolls" I was so excited that I tol my dad I wanted to go get a baby doll from there. My dad then explained those were grown-up dolls... that just made me want one more. I asked every day for a week... until my mom finally said that those were grown ups who wore doll clothes... even then I said "dress up?" She said it wasn't that kind of place!

Rather Not Say

Once, in the little Church daycare center while my parents were at church when I was 7 or so and I was about to have my first communion, my friend whispered to me that she found out what sex was. I excitedly asked her and she told me you had sex by "a girl and boy licking eachother's elbows" and this is why it is physically impossible to lick your own elbow unless you're a fairy. She told me she learned this in a book in her house.

I believer her till I was 11.

kylie