When I was really little I believed that if the hazard lights turned on when you were driving the car would split in half and one half would turn left and the other right. Needless to say I was terrified of sitting in the middle.

anghi

I remember quite vividly a time when I was about five years old. After visiting a McDonald's, my dad was driving my Mom and I to my Grandmother's. I was happily eating my Happy Meal when suddenly I realised that the family was in grave danger. Hysterically crying, I told my dad he would kill us all because he was "drinking and driving" just like the tv commercials warn you not to.
My mother got a huge kick out of trying to explain the relative safety of the effect of strawberry milkshakes on one's motoring skills.

Nic

When I was 5,I used to believe that hitch-hikers were actually directing traffic, helping drivers by showing them the way to go. One morning on my way to school I decided to stick my thumb out to "help". I couldn't understand why all these cars kept pulling over - and why the drivers were getting annoyed when I walked away!

Madcat

My dad told me the hazard light button was actually for the ejection seat. And we didn't know which one it ejected. Thanks Dad.

Anon

As a child my parents had me convinced that the eject button on the car radio would eject me from the back seat. Thanks to this belief anytime I was being misbehaved in the car all they had to do was hold their finger over the button and I would start begging them not to push it.

Anon

My dad used to tell me that if I stuck my arm out the car window, it would get chopped off. I certainly kept my arm inside after that, with horrible visions of someone in a passing car holding a machete out their window for the sole purpose of cutting off people's arms.

Both arms still intact

When I was about 6 or 7, my father and I were driving in his car and he used the window washer fluid to clean off the front window. Curious, I asked him where that water came from. His explaination for it was that there was a little man who lived under the car hood and peed upward to clean off the window. Everytime after that, when he used the window washer fluid, I was always say 'Its the little man, peeing again.' and then he would always go 'Yep, thats right' and smiled at me. I believe his reasoning behind it for about a year until my mom finally told me the real story about window washer fluid and where it came from when she overheard me telling my dad that the little man was peeing again. I have yet to fully forigve my father for that one, he's still pulling stuff like that on me.

Des

When I was about 5 or 6, I thought the turn signals in the car went off because, the car knew your destination, and was giving you directions. I asked my mom how it knew and she told me that "she tells it" meaning that she sets the turn signal off. I, however, thought this meant that someone actually told the car when we got in where we were planning on going. Since I never caught anyone saying "Car, we are going to the grocery store" or whatnot, I assumed the car listened to our conversations as we entered, and from that inferred where we were trying to get to.

Amy

I used to think that so-called "speed bumps" were a waste of time, because if anything, I thought, they slow you down.

Disko

When I was a kid we used to take a lot of road trips, and when we got stuck in traffic my mom would always say, "look at this traffic jam." I was about 4 or 5 and I would look at the window for "traffic jam" but didn't know what she was talking about. Then, while playing outside, I saw some puddles in the street with oil floating in them, and I came to the conclusion that this was "traffic jam". I told this matter-of-factly to all my friends in elementary school, until my older sister made fun of me for it.

Anon