sex

As a child adults kept complaining about how much sex there was. They were probably talking about on tv or something, but I didn't make the connection. To solve this problem I decided I would follow what I called the "6 to 6 Factor" which meant when I "grew up and got married" I would only have sex between 6 p.m. and 6 a.m. That way it would be dark and no one would know, so adults couldn't complain.

Polly

When I first learned the definition of the word "lesbian" I could not, for the life of me, figure out how they had sex without even half a penis between them. After a great deal of thought, I decided that the only sexy bit that protruded from a woman is the breast, and that therefore lesbians must have sex by putting one woman's boob into the other woman's vagina.

Mia

When I was little I thought that saying sex would cause something bad to happen so my brother and friends would whisper S.E.X. behind the pond so we wouldnt get caught

Kyarsten

My younger brother thought that having sex was just being naked. My dad was taking a shower and my little bro told my mom that dad was having sex in the bathroom.

Christina098

I used to believe that shagging was a couple rubbing their pubic hair together. Carpets must have played a part in that thought.

Woo

Up until the time I was 13 or so, I used to think that kissing was something that was only done on TV or the movies. Then one day when the family went on vacation I saw a couple on the airplane kissing and was so stunned to see that it really was done in real life that I had to announce it to the whole plane. Needless to say, my Mum pretended I wasn't her child for the rest of the flight.

Tammy

When my friend was little she used to think that you had to put yes or no for sex but then she found out that it was a gender thing LOL

Jennifer

"Rape" meant that someone would force you to undress, and then steal your clothes, leaving you naked in a strange place. It was an especially cruel type of practical joke, causing great embarrassment.

Jim Dixon

When I was little I didn't know the meaning of the word "gay" other than meaning "happy" - so when bullies on the playground in elementary school asked me if I was gay, I said yes - until I found out what it meant. Turns out I was right the first time.

Rebecca

When I was little, I thought that the "sex" section on a driver's license told people how good you were at sex. I always tried to figure out what "M" and "F" stood for, exactly. Which one was bad, and which one was good?

Lexi

By the time I was 5, I had figured out that in order to produce a baby the "daddy parts" somehow had to touch the "mommy parts". I was very confused as to how this occurred though, as I believed that the daddy and the mommy had to lie down on the floor butt to butt, and that this action would trigger the "baby making switch". Furthermore, I thought the "daddy parts" were pointy like a knife, but with a bee stinger at the end...that was how I rationalized the strange noises I sometimes heard from my parents' room at night.

Sarah

I thought parents had sex only one time, right after they got married. In fact, I pictured it happening in a stall of the restroom of the Mormon temple where the wedding had just taken place. I was shocked to learn both of the activity's frequency and its close physical proximity to my own bedroom.

Chris Bigelow

When I was young, I knew that men had penises and women had vaginas and that the semen went into the vagina to make the baby. I wasn't really sure how the semen found its way into the vagina because to my knowledge, which happened to be based on some soft-core porn that I had stumbled across, the man rubbed his penis against the woman's stomach area during sex.

Andrew

I knew sex had something to do with bedrooms, and I had found diffrent things like condoms and a bra during a school cleanup in a forest nearby. My grandma and grandpa had a statue of a naked man and woman standing up pressed against eachother so I drew an educated conclusion: when parents have sex, they go into the bedroom, sneak out the window into a forest where they press their bodes against eachother, and thats how they did it.

An imaginative childhood.

My flat mate told me this one:

When he was 8/9 yrs old, people at school started to learn about sex and rude words. One boy had overheard the word frigid but somehow managed to mishear it and misunderstand it.

A story then went around school that people who had never kissed anyone were called "fridges". Some smart kid deduced that people who had kissed someone must then be called freezers!!

Lorraine

i used to believe a dildo was a thing that people sewed on when their thingy fell off.

Anon

When I was in 5th or 6th grade and had heard the word 'orgasm' but didn't know what it meant, I figured it meant some kind of organ in your body or something. So one day when I heard these two girls talking about orgasms in class one day, I happily joined in and said, "Yeah, well I think Kidneys are better than orgasms! Orgasms don't really do anything, and kidney's have a funner name!"

Anon

I once heard my parents having sex in the bedroom, and walked in on them, and thought they were playing a fun game ! The next day i kept asking if i could play next time !!! LOL

Anon

I used to believe that in order to have sex, you had to be completely naked. I mean, totally naked. I thought if there was any piece of clothing or accessory, it wasn't sex.

So, when I saw titanic, and that Rose had on her earrings during the sex scene, I knew that they couldn't possibly be having sex.

C

In the school yard when i was six we used to argue about what sex was in the school yard. One day a boy said he had seen his mother on-top of his father. We all were convinced he was lying, cos in the movies men werealways on top and we were convionced that that was how it was done.

S