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When I was three my parents took me to a petting zoo for a treat. I went to pet a billy goat who, for some unremembered reason, rammed his head into me. I thought I'd been butted by his horns so I pulled up my t-shirt to see if I'd been cut. Lo and behold I did have a small hole in my tummy. Yes folks, it was my belly button but I didn't know this so for years I believed it was due to being headbutted by a goat.
When I was little I knew that belly buttons had something to do with babies, but not what. Plus all the men in my family had "outies" and all the women had "innies".
So I decided that when a woman was pregnant, the baby would grab a hold of the inner end of the belly button and breathe through it like a snorkel.
My belly button is more like a hole. When I was a kid, I used to believe that as we grow up, all the new skin comes out of the belly button, like an whirlpool going backwards. I had to keep it clear of lint at all times, otherwise the new skin would have trouble coming out.
My uncle once told me that God gave us belly buttons as a place to put our bubble gum while we ate ice cream. The next time I had ice cream I tried it. What a sticky mess!
Until I was 5 or 6 I believed that babies came out of the belly button. I was convinced it had to take quite a lot of time, and showed all my friends the little baby that already was growing in my belly button. Wehen they said it didn't look like a baby, I rolled my eyes and made them understand that it wasn't finished until I was adult.
I have always had an "outie" rather than an "innie" belly button and this used to upset me when I was young as I wanted to be like all of my friends who had innies. My mother told me that mine was magic and all I had to do was push the button and make a wish. So when people thought I was weird for having a sticky out belly button I used to tell them this story. (they probably thought I was even weirder then). I believed my mother though and waited patiently for all my wishes to come true.
When I was little, my uncle told me that his belly button was a scar from where he got shot in the war (WWII). I have no idea why I never realized that I had a remarkably similar "scar."
i used to pick at my belly button a lot, and my parents got sick of me sitting at the dinner table just picking at my belly button. So they told me that it was only a knot holding my insides in, and if i picked at it too much, all my organs would fall out. The next few months i went around with duct tape over my belly button.
When i was young, i used to think that babies were born by the mummy pressing her belly button when she wanted a child. I used to go around pressing womens belly buttons.
when i was about 3 or 4, i believed that my mom's belly button was a window for the baby. when she was pregnant with my sister, i kept trying to look in so i could see her.
my childhood friend told me not to touch the bandage covering her new brother's belly button. if i did, she said, the baby would explode. i said that was ridiculous, and leaned over the crib to touch it as proof.
the baby farted, and i fainted.
When we were little girls, my best girlfriend would wear a band-aid across her belly button so that the air wouldn't come out of it and make her zoom around the room like a deflating balloon. I secretly always hoped the patch would fall off when I was over playing because I thought it would be funny to see her flying!
When I was about 5, I thought that everyone started out as an "outie". Your belly button was a "turbo boost" button, that would make you run very fast. But you only got to do it once. Once you pressed it, it stayed in, and you were an "innie" for the rest of your life. The strange thing is that I actually have a memory of the time that I "used up" my turbo boost. It must be a false memory, but I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to make my belly button come back out so that I could run fast again.
when i was about five, i was certain that if i put my hand over my "belly button" i could feel a small amount of air coming out of it when i breathed
I used to believe that the sole purpose of your belly button was to serve as a soap dish. I would lay in the bathtub and puor liquid soap into my belly button, and dip my washcloth into it, and proceed to wash my body.
When I was about 4 or 5, my Mother was telling me about weddings. she said 'you hold your flowers there...' + clasped her hands near her belly button. So I assumed you must shove the stalks down your belly button, as it was a purpose-made rest for a wedding bouquet.
I used to believe that my belly button was my brother. I named him Tummy. Then I got a little older (three) and gave him the more grown up name of Jamie. I told people that I had three sisiters (which I did) and one brother (which was a belly button).
My younger sister used to believe that in everybody's belly button there lived a family of squirrels.
Up until I was six or seven, I had the most protruding "outie" that my family had even seen. My aunt constantly teased me about it, swearing that she was going to cut it off and make an "innie." I was so scared that she was telling the truth, that I never went in the kitchen when she was cooking with knives.
When I was in second grade, I spent hours slacking off in class trying to turn my "innie" belly button into an "outie" one.
I had never seen an outie before, and so I thought the only way people got outies was if they did it themselves.
I was so convinced I could do it, I used every tool available, from my fingers to tweezers, to the eraser end of a pencil. All that resulted was a whole lot of pain and discomfort.
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