I used to believe that when the compresor on the water fountain kicked in that it was taking my picture and charging me for the water so I always tried to finish before this happened.

PWR

I remember thinking that school NEVER ends. I thought when my parents "went to work" it was just like they were in 40th grade or something. One day my mom told me to get ready to go to our neighbors graduation. I asked what "Graduation" was and when she told me I was like "SCHOOL ENDS?????!!!" I was SO excited!

GB

I used to imagine schoool as being a hallway made of bricks with bars and stools. The students would sit in the dimly lit, narrow corridor and write all day long. Beside them would sit a bowl of water to rest their hands in when they got writer's cramp.

Weird chil

When I in kindergarten, teacher once said, "Raise your hand if you know the answer." Having never heard the phrase "raise your hand", I thought she said "raze your hand" - "raze" as in "razor"! So I started miming an electric razor shaving the palm of my hand! Everyone laughed and I was so embarrased!

Kdees

During my time at Infant school we always had an assembly on Monday mornings. Every time just before we said the Lords prayer one of the boys would get up and leave the hall. I asked a friend why and he told me that the boy was a Jehovah’s Witness. For years I thought it was odd that he had to talk to the police every Monday.

Tom

I used to see posters on the school noticeboards saying 'Remember Rubella' and thought that it must have been about a girl who died horribly at school because she was messing about.

Ric Brailsford

Before I started secondary school, I used to think that getting detention meant being locked up in a small dark room by yourself for an hour.

Anon

I had a friend (Tom) at primary school who was forever getting his words mixed up. He arrived home one afternoon and told his mother he had been exercising in the school's new gin museum (he meant gymnasium).

David Wiggins

The night before my first day of kindergarten, I was very excited. I pictured "school" as this cross between a medieval monastery, a planetarium, and a mad scientist's lab. People in long flowing robes. Wild chemistry set-ups with bubbling flasks and spirals of glass tubing. At "school", I would finally get to learn the secrets of the universe.

Imagine my surprise at the kindergarten classroom. My heart fell, but after a bit, leaped with hope again as the teacher said that we should "line up to all go to the lavatory". I heard "laboratory", and thought this was finally it. Clearly they had all the cool stuff hidden in some other part of the building.

But then saw the prosaic tiled wall and then realized it actually meant "toilets".

School has not lived up to my dreams yet, but I think I'm still looking for that same thing.

Liz Henry

When I was in the first grade, sixth graders where huge. I was certian that they lived on their own and drove cars.

Anon

In maybe 3rd grade, I was sitting in class daydreaming, and suddenly the teacher was asking me to go to the office to get a "one hole punch". I thought it was some sort of punishment for not paying attention, but dutifully went to the office and told the receptionist that I was there for the "one hole punch". All the while I was wondering if the principal, a tall bearded man, would be administering the punishment himself.

I was relieved when she gave me this funny metal instrument to take back with me. Phew!

Des

I used to think that "going steady" meant you paired up with a girl and then the two of you would study for tests and do homework together.

toon

When I was little, my older siblings went to mixers. Mixers were when all the Catholic grade schools went into a gym and "mixed". I never asked what mixers were because I didn't want to be stupid.

So, up until I actually went to one, I believed mixers were evening cooking classes.

D'oh

When I was at primary school the "big" kids had studied the french revolution, and they had made a cardboard model of a guillotine. They were going to show it to the school, class by class. It was my class's turn on a Friday, and I had been told by one of the "big" kids that they were going to chop off our heads. I didn't want to seem like a coward and so I didn't tell my brother or my parents. I went to school in the morning after saying goodby to my Mum and Dad, and I thought "this is it". Well, the time came and of course there was no execution. Unfortunately i peed myself in the line to go into the class because of my nerves.

Adam

I used to believe that the Chinese boy in my kindergarten class flew from China every day to get to class.

Debi

In my first week of kindergarten, we were offered the opportunity to attend bible school (in an RV parked off the school campus) once a month. However, my parents were not religious people, so I'd never really heard of the bible. I had, however, seen "An American Tail" way too many times.

Spilling off of the school bus that afternoon, I told Mom, very enthusiastically, about my chance to go to Fievel school! I just couldn't wait to learn more about that adorable Russian mouse!!!

K.R.

When I was in grade seven, I thought the name of a geometric angle was "ejaculate" and called out that answer during a lesson. I didn't realize until grade eight that the CORRECT name for the angle was "adjacent". Everyone had laughed at me, but no one told me I was wrong, even the teacher!

Mojo!

I used to believe when you were first born your parents would ask you if you wanted to go to school or not. I was so jealous of my cousin (her parents schooled her).

Grace

My first day at school was really traumatic, I clinged onto my mother's skirt so that she wouldn't leave. She turned to me and said "you'd better get used to it because you're here for the next eighteen years". I really thought that I wouldn't see her again for eighteen years.....

BigSis

Up until I was in the second grade I understood multiple choice questions that asked "which number is bigger?" to mean which digits were larger. I would measure them with a ruler and circle the 'biggest' one. My 2nd grade teacher saw me doing this and asked why. When I explained she corrected me, saying they wanted the number that meant 'more'. DUH. Well hey, this sure simplified these tests!

VLB