toilets : general - I Used To Believe

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When I was seven, we were at my parents friends house and the woman asked me if I wanted to "spend a penny" before going on a walk. I told her I couldn't because my purse was in the car....

Rosanna

When I was young, my mother explained to me that the water that you flushed down the toilet would end up in the ocean or a river. So, I started to think that when you flushed the toilet, the pee and poo floated down the pipes and out into a large body of water. (This is especially sad when you know that my father works in waste water treatment!)

Maeghan Jade

I used to believe that whenever I went into the restroom in public, everyone outside instantly stopped whatever they were doing and all paused to listen to the speakers which were placed all around the store so that everyone could listen to me in the bathroom. Of course, everyone went back to normal once I came from the bathroom.

Raven

One day, when I was about four or five, my aunt came to visit and after a while excused herself and said the was going to "the lavatory". I'd never heard it called that before, so immediately I put my shoes on and asked if I could go with her -I'd never been there before! *groan* I'm almost 22 now and it's still brought up at every family gathering...

Hayz

I used to think that rest rooms were rooms you could go to rest in if you were tired while shopping. I imagined that they had little cots in them.

Sarah

I use to believe that if you jumped down the toilet, you could get to a magical world(I was only 4 at the time). Anyway one day I climbed up onto the seat and jumped in feet first! It hurt and my feet got stuck.

I learned the hard way...

Until I was 8 or 9, I believed that "vacancy" was another word for "toilet." I don't quite remember where my original idea came from, but it probably had something to do with the toilets in airplanes and the little "Vacancy/No Vacancy" signs on the doors. Every time we drove by a motel with the "No Vacancy" sign lit up, I thought it meant the motel had no toilets, and I wondered why anyone would ever want to stay in a motel like that. I think I once excused myself from a room by telling all the adults I needed to go use the vacancy.

Anthea

I used to believe that their was a toilet monster named johny.

sexyallie_69

When I was little, I used to play in the backyard a lot with my dog. It was a bother to come inside and do the whole toliet routine everytime I had to pee. The dog had it so easy...just squat and pee on the lawn. So one day I decided to give it a try. It didn't work as well; I ended up with wet shorts, and my mom thought I'd lost my mind.

Robbie

my primary school had a toilet labelled "invalid toilet" - i assumed it was "invalid" as in "not valid" rather than "disabled", so I thought it was just a broken toilet. For years I wondered why the school bothered to make a professional-looking sign for it, and why they didn't just fix the toilet.

incidentally, the school didn't have any disabled kids, so it was just used to store some cleaning equipment and a ladder - this just added further mystery for me when I took a peek inside.

Handsome B. Wonderful

I used to believe urinals were sinks and I would spend a long time trying to find the faucet and pressing various areas of the urinal hoping to make water come out. Needless to say, it never did.

Confused

I used to think that when I turned off the light in the downstairs toilet (not the upstairs) I had to be off the ground because it disapeared for a second. It started off as a game at first but I soon started to believe it.

stef

I used to believe that by doing my buisiness, I was feeding the toilet, and I got upset when i was constipated, because i thought I was starving the toilet.

Anon

I used to think that the toilet was a private swimming pool for myself. I later found out that pushing the button and sitting in it was not such a good idea.

I use to think that your tiolet was just a fast way of washing your clothes!! AHHHHHH! Until it swollen my favorite socks and the water over flood so I thought it was just mad at me and wanted to punish me by getting me wet !!! huh huh

azhip

When I was 4-10, I used to believe there was a big crocodile living under my grandparents toilet. He'd only stay alive if I would feed him (..my poo, yes). We also had long conversations while I was on the toilet. I stopped believing in him (or maybe I never did, and he was just a way to fight boredom) when I figured out how to do the crossword puzzles in my grandmother's magazines.

Usagi

When I was young, I watched a cartoon that said that you could take a bath by sitting in the toilet, and it would whip you around right after you flushed.
I learned two things.

1. Do not ever stick your foot down the hole. It will get stuck and cost someone a whole lot of money to fix, and, someone will be very angry with the fact that you can not get out of the toilet. Trust me.

2. You, in fact, do not get whipped around. The toilet overflows around you and then you will end up with toilet water all over the floor, and in your mouth. It is disgusting.

Do not try this at home!

Silly Me...

I used to believe our toilet was really a spaceship. I would put the lid down and sit on it backwards facing the cistern. The cistern had a red button (with the manufacturers name on) and this was the control panel which I would set before takeoff. I would then count down 5-4-3-2-1-ignition! and pull the flush handle. This bit was very scary as the toilet sounded like a rocket engine underneath me and I really thought it might blow up if there was an accident.

Having survived the mission I would stand up and go outside for a look round. The new planet always looked strangely similar to Earth but this never put me off.

Viv

I used to belive that down the toilet was dinosore land

Spike

You know in the areoplane toilet, well when i was really young i used to believe that when you flush the toilet all the waste would drop out of the plane on to the ground below! Boy was i wrong!!

chili-pepper

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