animals

When I was small I was told that sausages came from pigs and I thought there was a little hole in their sides where the sausages came out. I even drew it for my teacher for homework

My Mom would explain large gatherings of birds on the telephone wires as "they are having church service - they are just waiting for their pastor to show up"
I always felt sorry for the birds, because sometimes they would still be sitting there when we were on the way home from our church - and that had been unbearably long for me...imagine those poor things having to sit there even longer.
I was always wondering which one was the pastor - i would have thrown a rock at it...

When I was 4 or 5 years old, I witnessed our cat, Petal, pooping live mice out of her rear end. I was sure that that was what was happening. I had seen cats in cartoons swallow mice live, it made sense to me that that was how they would come out, squirming and gooey from the trip through the cat. Later my Mom explained to me that Petal had had a litter of kittens! D'oh!

I used to think that there was a chipmunk in my backyard hosting some kind of chipmunk game show. My friend and I used to run around in the hopes that we would be caught on camera and therefore become famous in the rodent world.

When i was younger my sister told me that when you cut worms in half they would be become 2 seperate worms. so when ever the trick came up where you could cut the person in half (you know with the wooden box?) i just figured they were 2 people. which was aslo my explanation to 'midgets'

When I was a kid I truly used to believe that all cows that were brown were female and the black and white ones were male (bulls). I thought it was great that they and others so easily could see which was which. But I didn't really know what to think about the brown and white ones....
It took a few years before I understood that the colors had nothing to do with their gender.

When I was a little girl my Daddy and I watched lot's of scary movies together. One of them was a Twilight Zone that showed a man lose his mind after earwigs crawled into his ear and damaged his brain.

I still get the creeps when I find an earwig near me, maybe if they were heavier walkers and I knew they were coming........

I used to believe that the little top on the blue berries were spiders- I would NEVER eat blueberries and i was disgusted when other people did. I told all of my friends and they believed me too (we were in first grade) We basically started this whole "don't eat blueberries" club around school until one of the teachers told us otherwise. They all blamed it on me now my nickname is "the blue spider" ~ How embarassing

when i was little i used to think my dog was like a cow and produced milk when she had puppies and so i got a bucket and milked her and put the milk in a cup and drank it and spit it out i remember thinking this is the worst milk i ever ever had!!!!

A story told to me by my mom: When I was younger we were in the car and it was raining out. We drove by a field of cows and horses and I asked my mom how the horses and cows took showers? She jokingly told me that the farmer would come out and give them a bar of soap! I apparently believed her, and told my teacher how cows and horses took showers the next day at school!

When I was in second grade, my sister (who was a kindergartener) and I used to believe that the little black seeds that dropped off of palm trees were actually cockroach eggs. In an effort to diffuse a cockroach infestation, we gathered them during recess at school (or wherever else we'd find them) and collected them into plastic drink containers.

Once we filled it up with "cockroach eggs", we'd seal it shut and throw them away.

When I was small we lived near a dairy farm and I loved cows so much that I invented, and nearly convinced myself, of "horse-cows". The idea was that hamburgers weren't made of cows (the horror!) but rather of meat-eating horse-cows that farmers had to kill anyway in order to protect the other cows. Farmers could distinguish horse-cows from the other cows only by virtue of the fact they whinnied like a horse instead of mooing. At some point I also imagined them to wear red bandanas.

After many, many "say no to drugs" presentations in elementary schoo, I used to believe that ants could carry drugs into my nose while I slept. I kept the blankets up over my head when I slept to keep the drug-carrying ants away.

I remember eating clams on the half shell in this one restaurant. Every time we went there, I would order the clams. One time my sister whispered to me, while my parents we talking. She said "Norma, did you know that the clam is alive until you pull it off the shell with your fork?".

Enough said.

I used to believe that those little sparrows that hung out with the pigeons were baby pigeons! Meanwhile, baby pigeons can't fly (they stay in the nest until they spread their wings) which is why we never see them.

My sister used to believe that Buffalo wings came from very small, real buffalo’s and men ran about with little, tiny nets, catching these little, tiny buffalo’s. The men would then cut off of their wings to be served and then since they would be grounded, they grew up to be the big buffalo’s we see every day ~