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When I heard people mention sealing wax I thought it was ceiling wax. I couldn't fathom why anyone would need to wax their ceiling.
I used to believe that if i but on 10 years younger cream then i would turn into a baby again! me and my brothers used to dare eachother to put it on!!
My son currently believes that when the water flow to the tub or sink is slow (like when the washing machine, dishwasher or toilets are also filling) that we need to pay the water bill. The last time he said it was slow we told him we could only pay part of the bill this month and that is why it's slow. He asked us to please pay all the bill tomorrow.
One evening when i was very little, i was stupid enough to put my finger in the lamp where the lamp bulb is supposed to be, since the lamp was plugged in i got a really shocking surprise.
I starteled ran up to my mom crying, saying that the ”Electrick mouse” had bit me.
For a long time i belived there lived a grey mouse in there with a yellow glow.
I used to think that if you put something in the VCR it would show up on the TV so one day I was very disappointed when I put a piece of popcorn in it and it didn't work.
When I was in that "Why" faze all kids go through, and my mom was feeling especially frazzled, she once told me that inside every light bulb there was a fairy, and that sometimes when they burned out, the fairyies exploded, and that was why you could sometimes see a burnt mark on the outside of the lightbulb.
when I was little we had refrigerator magnet of aunt jemima the maple syrup lady. and I thought that she was my aunt. Which is weird because she is black and my family is white. I probibly beleived that till I was 14.
When I was about 2 or 3 and my mom would run the vacuum cleaner, I would hum along at what I thought to be the exact pitch. She used to tell me that if I hit matched it exactly, the vacuum would blow up. To this day, when I hear a vacuum, I hum along, but think of that and smile.
When I was really young I would get mad at anything that I ran into. If I ran into a wall or piece of furniture, I'd kick it back, as if it was it's fault, not mine. I would say something like "the wall hit me!" Or "stupid wall!" The habit got passed on to my friend and she once stuck her tongue out at a bar above the slide that she bumped into.
When I was a little girl, our water heater only gave us about 10 min worth of hot water to take a shower/bath. Well one time I was taking a shower and the hot water ran out. I was really upset because I wasn't finished. So my logic was if hot water turned cold, the cold water must turn hot. So I sat in the tub with the cold water running. I can assure you that it never got hot, not even remotly warm. I was all pruned up and my lips were blue by the time I figured that out.
I used to believe that the remote control could control all the things in my house, including my dog.
I used to believe there were tiny elves in the refrigerator that would turn on the light when they heard you coming. I would always try to sneak up so quietly, but could never be quiet enough to trick the elves.
When I was 4, I believed that if I "planted" a lollipop stick in my sandbox, a lollipop tree would grow. I did this in wintertime, and when the weather unraveled the paper from around the stick, I took it to mean that the lollipop tree was actually growing!
I Used To Believe...
I used to believe that when it thundered
It was the really the clouds bumping into each other
The rain came down, the clouds said hello
Casting a shadow on the young girl below.
I used to believe you asked God for a baby
He would then plant a seed in your belly, maybe.
I guess that belief was somewhat right,
Although it really happens in a bed, at night.
On that note, I used to believe,
You had to go to the doctor to conceive.
You would both put on a hospital gown,
Then on a cold metal table, you’d both lie down.
I used to believe that you’d find the devil
If you dug too deep in the ground with a shovel.
I called over to my gardening neighbor with a yell,
“You know, if you keep digging, you’ll dig straight to hell!”
When I learned the news, my breakfasts turned into horror
When my sister teased, “Guess who moved in next door?”
His hair was stringy white, and his name was Sam.
Our new neighbor, I thought, was the Quaker Oatmeal Man.
I used to believe that Euthenasia
Involved the study of the children in Malaysia.
This got corrected in a high school class
When I raised my hand; made myself look like an ass.
Another belief I also bore
Was that A.D. really stood for “After Dinosaurs”.
It really means in the year of the Lord
Clearly in Latin class, I daydreamed, bored.
I used to believe when you drank too much booze
Your blood got thin, that’s why you got loose.
Then I learned, what’s really to blame
Is the alcohol, pickling your brain.
Looking back on the things that I thought,
Some of them right, many of them not.
I realized I will never know it all,
We are all pretty clueless, after all.
My little sister and I used to take my mom's used tampon applicators out of the garbage and use them as pretend horns. My mother told us not to blow in them because they had been in her bird. We always believed she was just telling us that because she didn't want us going through the garbage to get our horns!
We used to have a really old, really loud tumble dryer. It used to shake violently when my mum turned it on and my sister and I used to think that it would shake itself free and start chasing after us. It was so loud and menacing we really did think it had a mind of it's own and wanted to 'get' us. We used to run and hide on the sofa every time it was on!
I used to wonder why the oven didn't set food on fire!
i never could work out how dishwashers worked. surely all that spinning around like a washing machine would mean that you'd be continually replacing all your plates, cups etc?!
When my mother hung the wash out to dry I would lay under them and try to catch all the dripping water because I thought that it was parts of my clothes falling.
I didn't understand that you bought a house where you wanted. I thought that when you wanted to buy a house, you would go looking for one. When you found one you liked, then you would trade houses with that family. When we moved, I thought that we traded houses with the other family and I asked them how they liked my old bedroom!