body functions

I used to believe…

u know the buzzing sound the tv makes? well my husbend (b/f back then) thought he was the only one in the world who can hear that and he had spechal powers.....he was 16 years old...i cant help but laugh to myself.

I used to believe…

Once as a schoolgirl, I was riding home on a bus from a field trip, when I suddenly felt a need to poo real bad! I told the teacher, hoping she could get the bus to stop somewhere where there was a bathroom. But she just told me to hold it in and the urge would go away. I tried that and, although I almost shat in my pants, by the time we got back to school the urge had at least somewhat gone away. I don't even remember whether I poopooed any time for the rest of that day or not. What I do remember is that I got the idea that holding back one's dookey was the good and brave thinig for little girls (maybe boys as well?) to do. Maybe those who best succeeded would eventually become perfect and quit having to crap altogether, so I thought. During the years to come I remember being frequently plagued with stomach cramps, heartburn, and the like. Suspecting no connection at the time, I only regretted that I never completely perfected myself by quitting having to doodoo altogether. Only years later do I now suspect a connection between that belief and my digestive problems!

I used to believe…

when i was little my unkle tony(who is funny but really discusting) told my that farts were magical and to put them in a jar. well i did and i actully pooped in it once!

I was always a very talkative young girl, and one day my dad told me that I would lose my voice if I kept talking so much. So, I believed that everyones voice boxes would run out eventually, like the life of a battery - it's limited. I used to just sit down sometimes and refuse to talk, in the hope of recharging my voice box.

I used to believe…

When I was about five, I remember mum telling me that if I didn't eat all my dinner, I'd fade away to a shadow. I spent years wondering what life would be like as a shadow. I also used to try to talk to shadows in case they were other people who didn't eat their dinner. Needless to say, none of them ever talked back to me. And I ALWAYS ate my dinner ...

I used to believe…

When i was little i overheard my grandmother and aunt talking about solutions for yeast infections so when i heard that i overthought what the word yeast ment and i thought i immeadeately thought that a yeast infection was when you ate too much yeast and had to swim in a yeast bath to cure it.

I used to believe that when I "made a poopie" in my diaper, marshmallows and Hershey's Kisses were coming out of my rear end.

I used to believe…

When my daughter was small she developed tonsillitis but she told everyone she had "tongues and lighters"

i used to think whatever you ate...just digested and would never see it....until one day i ate a pice of string.......later that day..i went to the bathroom and saw the same string attached to one of the turds....

I used to believe…

also when i was little maybe 6...I belived a paste maker actually made paste. Like tooth paste. My Aunt had just recently got a fake heart (paste maker) and i over heared her and my mom talking about her surgery. I poped up and siad. " Where does all the tooth paste go?" She looked at me funny for a while and then relized what i ment and started laughing.

I used to not know men peed standing up.

I used to believe…

From the first time i had learned about cancer to about 7 I thought that you had cancer if you lost hair. One day i was taking a shower and i noticed alot of hair came out when i brushed my hair. I started noticing it more and more until one day i came out crying saying i had cancer. My parents laughed at me and told me that it wasn't true lol

I used to believe…

When I was little I knew people in england were 7 hours behind us on the clock ( I had relitives there). I also knew that if you slept time would move faster. I put these two knolages togeather to come up with the belife that we are all conected in our sleep. So if you were having a day when time seemed to slow down it ment that someone in england was not sleeping there for making your day longer

I used to believe…

When I was a kid everytime I got a headache I thought I had a tumor, and was sure a meteor would strike the earth at any given moment.

I used to believe that when you flushed the toilet all of the water (and everything in it) would travel through a pipe to two men who had to strain out the poop so the rest could come back up to the toilet. I have no idea why I thought this...

I used to believe…

When I was younger, I used to believe that if you hled your nose and covered your mouth when you sneezed, your brain would blow out your ears.

Of course, I still believe that. I never tried.