body functions

i once thought there was a mean little monter in my tummy and if i didnt eat it would get mad and growl, and if i ate to much it would go crazy(giving me a tummyache) so somtimes i would talk to it and ask it to be nice to my tummy.

I used to believe…

when i was younger i read a book where someone slept with a calculator under thier pillow and it made them really good at maths. i took this sptory literally and for a few weeks i slept with books about everything i wanted to learn about under my pillow thinking the knowledge would jus jump into my head..it never did.

I used to believe that when I went to sleep I would climb out the window and go flying. It was so real and I could see for miles. So at school after this I would jump off walls with a brolley trying to do it again.
I think to be honest I still fly in my sleep.

I used to believe…

When I went to visit my Grandmother, I would always see that the water in the toilet was blue. I'd acuse my sister of not flushing the toilet because I was sure that since my pee was yellow, girl pee must be blue.

I used to believe…

Thanks to a book my first grade teacher read to us once, I used to believe that using my thumb to push food onto my fork would cause fruits and vegetables to sprout out of my thumb.

I remember being at a restaurant when I was little and my mom said something about the Nazis "gassing the Jews" and I thought she was saying "gassing the juice". I figured it meant when you try to fart but it squirts instead. I couldn't understand why my mom would be talking about something so disgusting while we were eating. (I guess what she was actually talking about wasn't very pleasant dinner conversation either.)

I used to believe that a town of little people lived in my stomach and that everything I ate or drank went through their little factories and then they would eat it too. I used to pretend that I would have conversations with the head of the factories about what things I should eat or drink more of since they were running out. I had a very active imagination. :)

i remember being told when i was about 4 that my mother had caught chicken pox from me when i was a baby. not knowing what that was, i imagined those plastic pots u have in the garden growing all over you and then green and red chickens would pop out of them every now and then

I used to believe that each day, we were only given a certain amount of "muscle" and we had to cash the "muscle" in whenever we wanted to move. This was because I heard my sister say, "It takes 15 muscles to smile and 40 to frown".

I was a smiley kid.

I used to believe when i was eating food that it was a family. MUMS AND DADS AND KIDS. ALL the different food types on my plate being different members of the family!!! If i did not eat it all I would split the family up and they would be devestated. However IF i ate all the food then they got to go on a trip into my body ( which to them was a theme park with rides etc) My Throat being a slide and other various attractions were my tummy which was s ticky wall they spun around in. I always felt so guilty if I didnt eat ALL my meals. I watched the remainders being binned and wondered if the family were mad at me !!!!!!!!!!!

I thought the human body was essentially hollow and when you ate, the food went all the way down to your feet and started taking up space. When it got all the way up to your neck, then you'd throw up.

I used to believe…

When I was about 5, my brother, who was about 13 at the time, told me that every time I blew my nose that part of my brain was coming out. After that I always looked into the kleenex to see how much of my brain I had lost. I believed him until I was about 8 or 9.

I used to believe…

When I was 5 I asked my Mom why my brother, 2 years older, can stand peeing and I couldn't. She said boys have their
peepers (meaning penis) sticking out and girls have chippers (meaning clitoris and vagina) against their body.
So from taking baths with my brother I knew the end of his peeper had a hole for pee, I thought my clitoris had a hole and I always looked for it. Obiously never did. Not till I was 10 I found out where the peehole was.

i used to think that i was the only person that swallowed my spit

I used to believe…

When I was little, I used to believe that when moms breasted, one boob was for milk, and the other was for food. I used to try to figure out which was left and which was right.

I used to believe…

When I was young (around age 7) my Grandmother used have really great sayings. There's one in particular that I remember with fondness she used to say whenever someone was coughing from having some food or drink that went down the wrong way. She'd say something like "Oops, that went down your Monday pipe, and here it is Friday". This quaint little turn of phrase led me to conclude that I had 7 different pipes that lead to my stomach!