body functions

I believed that I was the only one in the world that could conjure up a mouthful of water at will (turns out it was saliva). I told my mother I would never have to drink water again because I made my own.

I used to believe when someone said they broke their leg, their leg actually fell off and they had to get a fake one. One day when my mom told me my grandma broke her leg I started crying thinking she wouldn't have a leg anymore.

I used to believe that if I looked at something without blinking for a long time, I could move it. Of course, when I tried I couldn't keep my eyes open for more than a few seconds. I also believed that if you jumped off of something and flapped your arms like a bird you would fly. I, being the small idiot I was, tried this with my tree in the front of my apartment. The end result was back pains. Luckily, the tree was only three feet off the ground.

I used to believe…

When I was little, I used to believe I could magically appear in Chicago if I completely covered myself in a sheet on my mom's bed and then spun around and around with the sheet on me. Then I'd take the sheet off my head and I'd ask my mom if I was in Chicago yet.

I used to believe…

When i was younger and going for a "number 2" i used to think that i was having a baby and it would be in the toilet and i'd have to get it out.
Then i realised that certain things had to happen before a baby could be born...

I used to believe…

when I was about 4 - 5 years old a nurse in the ospital told me that if I won't eat the hospital's awful dinner
or any other dish I'll be so light that I'll start flying to the sky like a baloon and I'll die and that no one will help me - the polish reality is awful because no one cares about children goodness:-(

I used to believe…

when I was little, I used to believe that when my feet fell asleep, hundreds of ants were trying to lift me up. My dad told me to get rid of teh ants, the had to stomp my feet.

I used to believe…

When my sister and I were young, when we were in the bath she used to mix soap and water and give it to me. She said that my mother told her to give it to me as medicine or i would die. So I drank that soapy water for years, until I finaly worked it all out!

I used to believe…

When I was about 3 I thought I could fly. I was going to be a witch for Halloween and all the witches on television could fly. So why couldn't I? I too my broom and my witch hat and jumped off the counter in the kitchen. Needless to say, I learned I couldn't fly the hard way.

I used to believe…

At age 5 I really wanted a bow and arrow set, but my Mom said I was too young. I used to dream I was a Pilgrim in a log cabin, being attacked by Indians. When they left I would run outside and pick up all the arrows and put them under my bed. When I awoke, I would jump out of bed and look underneath the bed for the arrows I had collected during the dream. I was so disappointed to find nothing. I did this for many nights, knowing someday it would work.

I used to believe I was the fastest boy in the world because I once crossed a large gym in four seconds(honestly!)and all these people were wondering how I went that fast.I was 10. Now I feel like I feel like I'm gonna get a heart attack whenever I run that fast.

I used to believe…

when i was little,i was afraid to go to sleep,not because of monsters,but because i thought i couldn't breath when i was asleep.My brother told me when your asleep,your body cant work,so i took a deep breath every night before i went to sleep

I used to believe…

When I was little my grandma always stressed the importance of a routine to me. So every night for about two years at exactly two a.m. I would leave my bedroom and go into the livingroom, I would turn on the porch light and go outside. I would stand on the porch until the were no cars on the street the I would skip down the sidewalk to the other side of our house. We had this flower garden with several rosebushes in the back of it. I would walk in between two rosebushes and pee. I would almost always scrape myself on the thorns. After I finished peeing I would skip back down the sidewalk and back to bed.
My mom always wondered where I got the scrapes because I never got them during the day and they would always be there in the morning. I told her I didnt know where them came from.
After a couple of years of my routine my mom had fallen asleep on the couch, my dad didnt want to wake her so he turned off all the lights and the tv and let her sleep. While I was busy at my routine I had opened the door to go outside at 2 in the morning I was only 8. I had woken my mother and she screamed, "What are you doing?" I had replied that I was only doing what grandma had told me to do and I would like to finish my routine if that wasn't a problem with her. (I was mouthy)She told me to go to bed. I was so mad at her for not letting me finish my routine I didn't talk to her for a week. To this day she still doesn't know where all the cuts came from and what I was doing at two in the morning. Shortly after she caught me she had an alarm installed that went off when the door was opened, she made sure I never completed my routine again.

I used to believe…

One day I saw a man peeing on tv, until then I always thought they sat down like us girls did. After I saw that I thought I did it wrong so I stood over the toilet and peed. I did this until years later and I was at my friends house and we were both in the bathroom and she peed the way I use to. I was so confused about which was the right way that I cried until her older brother explained it to me. Then, I went back to the old way.

I used to think if you slept on your right side(the side in which I thought your heart was)you would crush your heart during the night so I would always sleep on my left side, little did I know your heart was on your left when I found out I was horrified that I came so close to death so many times, I could barely sleep anymore unless i was on my back

I used to think when I feel asleep anywhere besides my bed(Like the couch)hundreds little mice would come and lift me up and take me back to my room because in the morning I would aways end up back in bed.