body functions

I used to believe that everything in the world had a thin black outline, like in a coloring book. I swore up and down that I could look at things and see their black line

I knew a stupid kid at school when i was 8 years old that told me that baby aliens were living in your testicles and if ya pee hard enuf, they can come out and abduct you. but I was very gullible and literal and he horrified me

i used to think that when something smelled really bad and you begen to breath through your mouth instead of your nose that your beath would smell the like awful stentch you were breathing in

i used to think that in my stomach there were shelves and my food would go down my throat and land on the shelf, and that there was a pool or cup or something on the bottom for all the liquids to go to... yeah

I used to believe…

when i was younger i used to watch the movie Hook alot and i was convinced that i could fly by thinking happy thoughts,when it didnt work i thoughtit would help if i jumped off my bed while thinking,i kept finding really high places to jump from until i got hurt and realized the only way i could fly was if i had wings so i put on some fairy wings from a halloween costume,wow that was stupid...

I used to think that I could breath underwater by cupping my hands over my mouth and filtering the oxygen out of the water. I told my mom that I couldn't understand why more people didn't try it. I was devastated when she laughed and tried explaining that things just don't work that way. These days I still have dreams that I can breath underwater...

I always drank lots of water and I jumped on my bed.When i jumped on my bed i could hear the water in my stomach moving around and i thought it was my blood so i would stop jumping so i wouldnt get a nose bleed.

I used to think that if I tried hard enough, I could actually jump off the ground and fly like ten feet as if I were a person walking on the moon, and 'till this day I still have a major fascination with defying gravity.

I used to believe…

Until I was about 6, I believed that nobody farted except the people in my family, because I never heard anybody else fart. Then, one day, I was walking with my older brother and a friend of his, who farted out loud. That, literally, blew my belief away.

I used to believe…

When I was a little kid me and my sister would kick the wall a lot and so my mom got really mad and said if we didn't stop kicking the wall we would get the chicken pocks. So we kept doing it than I go the chicken pocks and I got really scared and never kicked the wall again!

I used to believe…

Hmmm. The same 'used to fly' belief, except- logically (for a seven year old) I could only do it with wings. So I taped paper wings to my arms and practiced by jumping off climbing frames. Except I swear I managed it once- I went too far for it to just me a jump, and landed too light...

i used to believe that after you rub the sleep out of your eye it will jump back in. so when i woke up in the mornings i would make sure i got the sleep on my fingers and open our front door and flick it outside, that way i figured it couldnt find me

I used to believe…

Being the smarty pants sixth grader that I was, when I got my first cold sore on my mouth I began to research it to find out what and why I had this thing on my lip for. (I still wonder why I even had one) Then I find out that it is Herpes Simplex (I or II, I don't really remember now) But I wanted to sound smart and told everyone who asked what was wrong with my lip that I had herpes, and I said it very proudly, thinking I sounded super smart. Finally a teacher pulled me aside and explained why it was not such a good idea to be exclaiming that to the entire middle school. I was mortified.

I use to believe that if i blew my nose that i would be able to blow all the snot out and then my stuffy nose would go away. So i'd sit in the bathroom for hours just blowing my nose, waiting and waiting for it to run out of snot. I mean you can really only have so much in you right?

I used to think that you weed through your bum and passed solids through your front end. I used to think, that must be really painful for boys! (I thought that their male parts were the stored poo) gross! I WAS only 2.

I used to believe…

My father has a sick sense of humor. When I was a little kid, I was prone to cold sores around my mouth. He told me they were herpes, and so when adults would ask me what was on my lip, I would reply simply, "Herpes."

I used to believe…

When I was around 10 I thought I had a brain tumor and would have black-outs. Since, you can't remember blacking out it seemed logical. I also thought that my parents didn't tell me about it because they didn't want to upset me.