body functions

I used to believe…

My mother sewed clothes for my sister, so when the adults talked about getting stitched-up at the hospital, I envisioned some sort of large machine that you would be run under to get sewn back together.

I used to believe…

That dreams were memories of infancy coming back. So a dream where I was flying meant that I used to be able to fly. I remember being six and telling another kid, "When I was two I could fly, but I can't now because I'm heavier."

I used to believe that when you ate food, there were slides that went from your stomach and went all the way down to your feet and all of your food just went to your feet.

I used to believe…

when i was smaller my mom told me that if i walked around the house without shoes, little bugs would climb into me and make me sick

I used to believe that if you kept food I your mouth for too long without swallowing, it would turn into poop. I always made sure to chew and swallow as fast as possible.

I used to believe…

When my sister and I were younger I used to tell her that when people farted it left a bubble in the seat of their pants. She thought that's what butts were. People with big butts farted a lot and were very stinky.

I use to believe that oompa loompas were inside our bodies making it function, i.e. pumping the heart and digesting our food

I used to believe that standing on my head while taking something to cure a headache would make it go away faster, because the medicine went straight to my brain

I used to believe…

When I was little I fed my little brother bubbles because I thought they would make him float. Of course I never ate the bubbles. They tasted bad.

I used to believe…

At age 5 my babysitter told me that me that my insides would collape if I sneezed and farted at the same time.

I used to believe…

When i was a kid i thought that your body was hollow and when you ate food it just dropped to your feet and pushed into your toes and slowly built up, probably because of the saying, 'all full up'

I used to believe that I couldn't fall asleep until I yawned, and that I would have to be COMPLETELY still afterword. If I moved at all, I would have to wait until I yawned again and didn't move before I could fall asleep.

I used to believe…

All through preschool I would pretty much only drink white grape juice and assumed the reason my pee was the yellowish color it was, was a result of the yellowish juice. One day while at my grandparents house i drank a big glass of purple kool-aid, then ran to the bathroom. I was very disappointed when my pee did not come out purple

I used to believe…

When i was little i never wanted to get up to go to the bathroom. So instead just going to the toilet i would eat lots of bread, thinking it would soak up all my pee curing my full bladder. In the end I always ended up giving up and using the restroom

I used to believe that if you scratched Chickenpox, they would grow into trees and the roots would feed off of your blood. Thanks to my older brother and sister :)

I used to believe…

A lady at our church had been through a stroke causing one side of her face to droop. Our mom informed my brother and I that it was because she slept with a fan blowing on that side of her face, which we loved to do every night. Consequently we moved our fans down by our feet. Touche Mom!