body functions

I used to think dog poop in parks was poop from homeless people, because i didnt know animals could poop too

I used to think that you got cancer by hurting yourself. I hit my funny bone on a door when I was 8 and it hurt so bad I was positive I'd given myself cancer. I didn't tell anyone because I was sure my mom would be mad that I was horsing around and getting cancer. I decided sticking my arm in the microwave after making food was the only way to cure myself and not get in trouble. After a few weeks I was cured and mom was none the wiser.

I used to believe…

When I was a little kid my Dad told me and my sisters that if we didn't eat the crust on our sandwiches we'd go bald like him. Needless to say we are all of our crust and now I use it on my kids.

I thought that if you continuously drank water while peeing it would pass right through you allowing you to go endlessly, as long as you kept drinking glasses of water. Peeing without ceasing. I guess that was my endgame.

I used to believe that the space left behind when you lost a tooth was much like a black hole, and that if I stuck my tongue to far into the little hole my tongue would get sucked up by my head and I would never have it again.

I used to believe…

When I was little I believed that if you tried pooping too hard you would poop out all of your insides so every time I went to the bathroom I would always try to go "softly"

I used to believe…

up until i was about 15 my 2 sisters and i used to believe that pretzels would soak up the pee so on road trips so we would stop complaining...thanks mom :)

I used to believe…

When I was sick when I was little, my mom would either say that I had a big fever or a small fever. I always though she was saying 'beaver' so I imagined that there was a beaver inside me when I was sick. If I was really sick, a huge beaver was inside of me.

I used to believe…

when i was little i used to believe that my new tennis shoes would make me run faster.

I used to think that when you slept, you stoped breathing. I would pretend to be asleep when my parents came into my room, and hold my breath. I would end up gasping for breath, revieling that I was awake.

I used to think that the "government" were a bunch of people that worked underground and our poop went by them on a conveyer belt. Probably because I asked my dad where does my poop go when I flushed it? And he said the government takes care of it.

I used to believe…

When I was younger, my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer. For some reason I thought he got cancer by someone spraying him with an aerosol can.

I used to believe…

when I was younger I use to believe that little men lived in your stomach, and they crused up all your food, then they pushed it out.

I used to believe…

When I was younger, my grandpa used to tell me that no one could smell your farts if you did them around no one else. I didn't want anyone to smell my farts so I would run behind the couch every time I had to fart..even during family dinners.

I used to think ringworm really was a worm in my skin

I used to be an avid milk drinker when i was 7. I thought the more you drank the bigger your chest would be when you got older.