body functions

i used to wish for special powers all the time... pretending...
my brother told me he could fly, become invisible, lift refridgerators,... etc...
i was so jealous!!!
now years later i know he was lieing!

I used to believe…

When I was little my cousin told me that if you sat on someone's head it would explode. For the longest time I believed her. Now I just think she wanted me to get off her head.

I used to believe that, since the only major visible difference between Superman and any other person was the cape, that his powers came as a result from that. I was also pretty sure that that tight feeling in my stomach that happened if I tripped a little going down the stairs quickly was what flying felt like.

So, putting two and two together, I thought that if I had enough speed and tripped going down the stairs while wearing my Superman cape from Halloween, I could sustain the flight indefinitely like Superman himself.

Luckily I was always too scared to really try it.

I used to believe…

My Best Friend (forever) at Primary School used to have an over-active imagination. She always would make stories up, and tell me them, at first I used to believe these stories, but then I realised she made them up. One time she told me that if you ate 5 nuts and seeds, and they lined up in your stomach, you'd die because you'd get a nut allergy. I didn't think it was true, but I stopped eating the pumpkin seeds in my lunchbox just in case it was...

I used to believe…

As a young man I believed that people's buttocks were stored feces. I thought people with large butts were infrequent poopers and people with skinny butss pooed daily.

I made a concerted effort to keep track of my on personal bowel movements for fear that I would forget and get a big butt.

I am the only girl in the middle of all brothers. As such, when I was little, I wanted to be a boy. I had seen them pee and assumed that if I faced the toilet when I peed, I would eventually grow a penis. After one failed attempt at peeing standing up facing the toilet, I just straddled the toilet thinking that'd be sufficient to grow a penis. I peed while straddling the toilet for at least a year before my mother asked what the hell I was doing.

I used to believe…

When I was very young I thought that as you eat, the food filled your hollow body and stretched it, and that's how people grow.

I used to believe…

For some reason I used to believe that weak, timid, wimpish and feeble people peed alot and that strong, tough and masculine people pooped and farted alot.
I also used to believe that girls wet themselves more than boys because girls don't have penises.

I used to believe…

When I was a kid, I thought that I could fly if I jumped high enough- but that once I did, gravity would no longer work, and I would go flying off into space and die.
So I never jumperd very high unless I was indoors.

I used to believe…

When I was little my mom used to donate her blood and in 1st grade I learned that your body is always making new blood. This lead me to believe that unless you give blood regularly your body would make so much that you would explode.

I used to believe…

When I was young I loved to watch science and nature shows all the time... even if I didnt always understand what was going on. I guess one time I saw something on how white blood cells and platelets worked. I got it sorta twisted in my head, and I thought that they were little robots that lived in your blood. When you got cut, they would go to work and repair you with little bits of yourself. So... logically, one should eat scabs, lick the blood off your wounds and eat your boogers so that you could recycle those materials when you hurt yourself or were fighting a cold.

I used to believe…

Royal families don't go to the toilet!!!
I used to said to my little brother that the King and Queen of Spain do not go to the toilet, because the are the "royal family". They had an operation so that they didn't need to wee or poo.
My brother used to beliefe it..., now we laught about it..

I used to believe that people with brown eyes pooped more than average (as poop is brown), people with hazel eyes did slightly more poops than average, people with blue eyes peed more than average (as blue is kind of like a watery colour) and people with green eyes did the average amount of pees and poops.

I used to believe…

When I was 4 my mum told me that I would be super strong if I eat spinach (just like Popeye). I didn't belived her so she said that we could arm wrestle after I eat it. I agreed and I won wvwry time... When I was 10, after long time, I ate spinach again and I asked her to arm wrestle. She told me that she let me win every time, and that that was for little kids... O_O I was SO disappointed..,

But I still like spinach...

I used to believe…

When i was young I used to believe that when your bladder was full you could eat dry foods (like crackers, chips, or bread) and it would absorb all of your pee so you wouldn't have to use the bathroom any more.

I used to believe women always peed their pants, and that feminine pads were used like diapers. This was because the liquid used in the pad commercials was always that same blue water you saw in diaper commercials.