body functions

I used to believe that when I blinked I would miss something important so I would try my hardest to never blink, because I didn't want to miss anything.
This stopped after my mother asked me what I was doing and she told me the truth.

I used to believe…

When I was younger when I would point at someone I would point with my hand under my eye. My dad could never figure why I pointed like that, he realized from my perspective that it looked like people were pointing with their hand under their eye.

I used to believe…

When i first got the chicken pots/pocks--whatever they are--my mum told me that in the morning i would turn into a chicken. i cried real bad all night and my mum felt guilty and tried to persuade me it wasn't true. In the morning when i saw i was me i smiled all day!

I used to believe…

as a child, i would sit with grandmother, she told me fanciful stories, one went like this.." When you sit too much, your ankles swell, When you sit too much, your knee caps blow, When you sit too much, cankles grow! ".. .i now cant sit for more than 5 minutes.

I used to believe…

When I was a child, I came to the conclusion that I was superman. It ended when I dashed towards a chain fence in a parking lot. It caught me in the chest, and I flipped over it and smashed my head into the concrete. Imagine the motion I would have made if somebody put one hand on the back of my head, and another in front of my ankles, and pushed equally forward with both hands.

I used to believe…

my mom used to use to tell us that if we stayed up to late, we would turn into pumpkins......i was afraid of becoming a pumpkin for the longest time.

I used to believe that you pooed whatever you ate for dinner the night before. For example, if you had a hotdog on a monday at 6 pm you would poo on tuesday at 6 pm and it would be that hotdog. I guess I had forgotten about the poo that came from breakfast and lunch...

I once overheard someone saying "Whaddya mean! Girls can't fart!" Umm, well. Anyway. I used to believe that farts were natural bombs.

I used to believe…

For a long time (from when I was about 3 to when I was 7) I thought that whenever my sister or brother grew a lot, and my parents mentioned it, that they had a 'gross purt', or a grosspurt. I really never could find out why anyone wanted to have a gross purt, but my siblings seemed to think that it was cool whenever they had a grosspurt, so eventually I accepted that they were okay. (I also never knew what a growth spurt was when I read it in a book...I started reading really early)
I didn't differentiate the two terms for a long time. Finally, one day, I realized that it really was a growth spurt. It's a lot less interesting, but it make a whole lot more sense.

I used to have the notion that all people could hear what others are thinking, so I always was very careful about what I thought. After a few years of believing that, I came to the conclusion that only certain people could hear what others are thinking since I couldn't hear anybody's thoughts. However, because these people don't look any different from anybody else, I still had to be very careful about what I thought. I still think those certain people are out there, but I've managed to convince myself that they don't preoccupy themselves with my thoughts because there are other people whose thoughts are more interesting. ...once in awhile though, I still watch what I'm thinking, in case They are listening.

I used to think that I would get AIDS if I let my head get too close to the toilet when I flushed it.

I used to believe…

When I was young, my mother told me that all people should poop at least once a day. I never pooped every day, so I, naturally, freaked out when she told me this, and tried very hard to poop every day. When I couldn't I thought I was constipated, and that constipation was a disease!
I know better now....

I used to believe that there was a hungry creature inside my belly, and that when it started growling it was demanding to be fed. I thought that if I didn't feed it, it would start to eat me from the inside! I was always afraid that I would be stuck outside playing somewhere and wouldn't be able to make it home in time to feed it when it got hungry.

I used to believe that the food we ate stayed in side of us forever.I didn't know about the whole digestive system thing.I would imagine humans as a pile of food covered with skin.

I used to believe…

My earliest memory in sitting in preschool at snack time eating, but taking little bites and chewing quickly because I didn't realize you could breath out of your nose if there was something in your mouth. All the sudden it hit me and I felt like I discovered something amazing.

I used to believe…

My brother told me he could lift the house up with his pinky. I believed him because he had reasonable excuses for not lifting it up. Like that there were poisonous snakes underneath the basement and they would eat me if he did.