body functions

I used to believe…

When I was little I figured since people got sick from being around people with an illness then I should be able to get to feeling good again if I started hanging around people who wern't sick, when I was.

I used to believe that black people crapped brown and white people crapped white. Having never seen a white person's poop, I had no idea that this wasn't true. Now I've still never seen a white person's excrement but I also know it's not true.

I used to believe that when I woke up in the middle of a dream, the other people in the dream would wonder where I went. It was especially gratifying if the dream was bad, like bad guys chasing me, for example.

I know it's silly, but as a child, I misunderstood what people said concerning Heart Attacks.
It sounded to me as if they were saying "Hard Attacks"
as though it were some great difficulty, and not involving the heart, at all.
Strange, but I was a child.

I used to believe…

When I was very little, if ever I burped or farted or had snot running from my nose, my mother's reaction would be to say, "Charming" in a haughty voice. Being too young to understand sarcasm, I thought "charming" meant something like "really disgusting". So I was always really confused by stories with Prince Charming in them. I mean, why would Cinderella marry a guy who burped and farted all the time?

I used to believe…

up till i was about 11
i tohught it was impossible to sleep unless you were beathing through your nose
i used to lie awake concentrating hard on breathing through my nose

I used to believe that when girls pee'd they would hover over the toilet. I finally was tod that they sit down (well, OK, saw that they sit down) when I walked in on my girlfriend. That was last yaer when I was 18.

I used to believe…

Up until age 8 or 9, I thought there was a big gear in my tummy that would grind up the food I ate. When my tummy grumbled from hunger, I thought it was because the gear needed food to lube it up. When I was full, I thought it was because too much food would prevent the gear from turning. Once the gear ground up more of my food, then I could eat some more.

i use to believe that when we ate all the food just went to our feet and we would fill up with food and when we threw up that was the way we got rid of it... never occured to me why i was always going to the loo....

I used to believe…

When I was 6 I became convinced that Grape flavored cough syrup (which was delicious to me) enabled me to have super powers. I convinced my 4 year old sister that this was true and over the course of four hours or so, we drank the whole bottle. Not long thereafter we were both puking our guts out and I got in trouble.

i used to think that, because i knew hot air rises, that if a girl with long hair farted, you would see a bubble shape rising up under her hair until it poped out at the top of her head!

I used to believe…

Once, while carrying a bowl of snacks and a glass of soda to my room, I believed I could actually drop the glass, reach into the bowl and grab a snack, eat the snack, then catch the glass and take a drink, everything perfectly unharmed. (I was 7.) I dropped the glass and took a snack and ate it. Then, I reached for the glass, but it was too late. The glass shattered upon the floor and I was grounded.

I used to believe…

When I was about 4 and 5 I thought you got chicken pox by getting pecked by a chicken.One day my brother bit me and the next day I got chicken pox ,then I ran up to my mom and yelled "MOM JAKES A CHICKEN DOES THAT MEAN DADDYS A CHICKEN AHHH!"

I used to believe…

you know the eye junk that you get when you wake up? when i was 9, my friend told me that you got that because when you laid down, all your boogers from your nose went up into your eyes. gross!!

I used to believe…

When I was about 5 I thought if you peed and pooped at the same time it would come out as diareah. So I would cover myself when i pooed so I would pee till i pooed to make sure to not have diareah.

I used to beleive that there were little men inside you body who pumped your heart, and made you breath etc.... I always wondered where they went to the bathroom.......

I used to believe that I could make all the scary dreams that I would have that night flash before my eyes before I went to bed. I would close my eyes and push in on them slightly until I started seeing dark colors swirling before me. I thought this was the evil that was going to show up and that doing so would cause me to not have any scary dreams.