being ill

I used to believe that people got babies when they got hurt and at the hospital they would give the baby as a reward. This was because when my cousin was born I asked my parents “ How did auntie get her?” They’re reply was that my aunt was wearing high heels and she slipped, so she was taken to the hospital and they gave her a baby of her choice. So one time I was throwing up a lot and then I was taken to the hospital. When the doctor said we can go back home I asked “ But where’s my baby?”. The doctor was speechless and my parents looked at eachother embarrassed.

🐼

One time I was sleeping over my friend’s house and I didn’t feel good. I didn’t tell her mom because I was afraid that she would take my temperature rectally because that’s how my mom always did it. When my mom took me home next morning I went right into bed and I had 105.5! When I told my friend she said that her mom had switched her to an ear thermometer!

Abby

There's a scene in Mary Poppins, where Mary's uncle is floating in the air laughing, then when the others laugh, they also float. Mary and Bert describe the uncle as "contagious", so my cousin and I thought that he had some sort of disease that made him float. We called it "the float-when-you-laugh disease".

Anon

At school, my swim teacher told me to run to the changing rooms, dry myself and get changed as quickly as possible or else "a cold might catch me."

I think it was a cross between the myth that being cold or wet makes you catch a cold, plus her desire to make me not dawdle. I was always skeptical but I never outright disbelieved it until later.

She'd describe said "cold" as being a huge, slimy green monster and when it caught you, you'd sneeze once, then fall sick with a cold.

At one point, I sneezed and she jokingly said, "That cold has caught you!". It was actually hayfever, but I freaked out.

She'd sometimes state that she could see the "cold" and I was wondering why I couldn't.

When I told her that I'd never been assaulted by a green monster, she said that the cold must be a very slow runner or I was a very fast runner.

At one point, I was scared because I thought I had slime on me and that "the cold" had caught me, but it turned out to only be a snail.

Anon

I thought a stomach ache was a stomach egg

Catherine

I use to believe that if my hair fell out I had cancer, and was most likely going to die soon.

Luca

I use to believe that you would get ill because you were naughty

R�oghnach

when i was a kid i used to think i got rashes and was itchy because bees flew in my ear and were flying around under my skin.

rachel

Since drinking after someone who was sick meant you might get sick, I used to believe that if you were sick you could drink after someone who was well to get rid of your sickness. This belief landed me a serious case of strep throat. I didn't believe it after that.

Heidi Moon

I used to believe that when my hair fell out in the shower, that I had cancer. Later I learned that the amount of hair I lost daily was normal, not to mention that "cancer hair loss" is caused by Chemo, not cancer.

Anon

I thought that borderline personality disorder meant the person almost had a personality disorder, but not quite.

THE_FISH

When I was a kindergarten student, I used to believe I could fly in the sky.
One day I tried to fly from the jungle gym and I broke my legs and hand.

saki