body functions: farting

Never hold back a fart. if you do it builds up in your brain and causes shitty ideas

When I was little i thought that when i farted, it ment that my butt burped

I remember when my sister was about 5, she would not fart in the tub. She thought that it would form a smelly-film on top of the water that would kling to every inch of your body when you were ready to get out of the tub.

When I was little, I used to enjoy smelling my farts. If I farted in public, I would have a disgusted look on my face and I would pretend to cover my nose but I would actually sniff them in deeply. I did this because I believed that smelling something strong and rancid would make my sense of smell stronger and able to smell the worst of things. Good times, good times..

One time my dad told me that if I fart and burp at the same time, you would implode. I tried and tried, but I couldn't do it. About six mounths later my dad told me that it wasn't true. That means I told all my friends a lie!

When I was a kid, I believed that my turds were alive, and mostly didn't die until after they came out of my ass. But occasionally one would die while still inside, and that would make a fart, a fart being the ghost of a turd that had died. Now that I'm older that theory would have to mean that most all of my turds now die while still inside my butt!

I used to believe that when I 'popped off', as long as I said 'Pardon me' it wouldn't smell. I hate to think how many times I farted in company and then quietly whispered 'pardon me', thinking no-one else would ever know what I had done!

I used to believe…

for a lot of years i wouldn't fart in the winter, especially on cold days. i used to see the way your breath made visible 'clouds' and thought that if i farted, my bum would do the same thing. this was only proved to be wrong about 3 years ago when i asked my now husband to see if it did leave a cloud behind me...it's a wonder he still married me after that lol

I used to beleive that the clouds were evrybodies farts. And if everybody kept farting soon the sky would be clogged up with cloud. It was when i was 8 in a geography class and i told the teacher the clouds were our farts that i found out that clouds werent our farts after a large amount of teasing

i once belive that if i farted it stunk really bad and smoged the earth and every one died except me!!

I used to thing that when you farted poison gas that would turn you into an animal and I wanted to fly and be a bird (I still do) so whenever I farted i'd turn around and see if I was a bird then said Oh *h*t missed again

If I didn't like someone I used to turn around and fart at them preying they'd become purple llamas O.o

i use to believe that if you fart it is a sign that you need to go poop!!

My cousin always told me if i hold in a burp or fart it will go back in and make ur slef bigger like a balloon! bc ur holding in air!

I use to believe I had holes in my bum cheeks for my farts to come out

when i first heard about heat sensor cameras, i always thought that most shops would have the cctv camera with this built in. i would never fart in a shop incase they were looking at the heat sensor camera, and see a big patch of heat coming out of my bum, i accidentally did one once, and i kept waiting for one of the shop staff to come over to laugh and point at me!
awwwwwwwwww

I used to think i giant green bubble would come out of your butt and pop when you farted, But then I looked in a mirror and farted, I was so disappointed