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When my brother Paul was a young child, he would fart constantly! This earned him the nickname of "Stinky." My sister and I would yell at him all the time to stop, saying it was disgusting. My mother would DEFEND him, saying,"Leave the baby alone! It's POISON! If he holds it in, it will make him SICK! He must've really believed her, because today, he is 32 years old, and he hasn't changed one stinkin' bit...
Sometimes I would walk through a room and let a fart, and then say "Watch out for that barking spider". One day my 8 year old son jumped up on the couch to avoid the spider. That's when I found out that he thought barking spiders were real.
I thought that farts were invented one day by my parents when I was about three for the sake of my own amusement. I really thought that before this moment there had been no such thing.
I used to call farts, hearts which my parents thought was really cute. They never corrected me and I could tell them in public, "I hearted" and it never was rude
I used to think my family was the only one that farted. Except we didn't call them farts, we called them Boomies. I was in first grade one day and a kid next to me let one rip. I said excitedly "oh, you make boomies too?" The kid was like "I don't know what you're talking about, I farted"
Thanks Mom and Dad
i used to think that there were little men (they kinda looked like lawn gnomes) who lived inside your stomach and controlled some of your bodily funcions.
it was a very dark habitat (i can still picture it to-day) and there was a big golden river. this river was your pee. and the gnomes would put your poo into canons, and that was how you pooped. but they weren't very smart, so sometimes they fired the canon without loading it... that's why you farted. and that's why people were teased for farting a lot, cuz they had really stupid gnomes.
I used to believe that parents were magic and had special powers.
My parents told my brother and I that they could see green smoke coming from our bottoms, thats how they knew we had farted! It didnt occur to me that they might have actually used thier noses!!
I used to believe that my immediate family were the only people in the world that farted
One of my elementary school mates once told me that if you burped and farted at the same time, you would die.
It was hard to test, and I was afraid to, but once the feat actually occurred and I didn't die, I figured it must've been because it wasn't _exactly_ the same moment.
I once told a friend of mine that if you held in a smelly burp, it'd turn into a fart. She believed me.
My schoolmate Nick used to think that girl's farts smelt of roses.