general

i used to believe that deodorant would stop making you sweat EVERYWHERE, so one day i walked downstairs and my mom asked me why i had white powder all over my face...

Kelley

When I was real little I use to think that if you talked too much your vocal cords would run out of cords and you couldn't talk anymore. So I was a very quiet child for a long time.

Ladybug

When I was little, I used to believe that when moms breasted, one boob was for milk, and the other was for food. I used to try to figure out which was left and which was right.

Frances

You know how you can hear your heart beating in your ear when you lay against your pillow. I used to think that was giants walking around at night looking for people to eat. So I would lay real still and try to hide under the covers. To this day I still sleep with the blanket pulled up to my chin

Deb

I remember when I was a child being told that humans "ONLY" have 10 pints of blood in their bodies. Because of that, I always feared dying from bleeding too much, as if our bodies didn't eventually replace our missing blood as we ate and drank food. I feared that after a while (say 10 years), if enough blood drained from me from all the times I got a scrap, that I would reach a point where I just didn't have enough blood to live, and would immediately die.

Anon

My parents said that the smell of manure was good for me. Whenever we drove past a farm, rather than wind up the windows, they would advise my brother and I to breathe deeply...

Rick

I used to think that my body was filled with really tiny workers; sort of like Oompa-Loompas. They controlled everything I did. I thought they helped me poop when I needed to go. So they pushed it, when it was too hard I even whispered, "Work harder, I need help!" They also painted pictures of my memories and thumbtacked or sticky-tacked them in the walls of my brain.

Kinda weird...

Oompa-Loompa

My baby sitter had a daughter who was a teenager, when I was five years old. When the teenager was away at school, I would go into her room and look at her clothes. I thought that one day, I would grow into a teenager overnight and I wouldn't have any clothes to fit me. I was scared I would have to go naked, until my mother explained that it is a gradual growth process, not an overnight growth explosion!

Anon

I used to always get the hiccups from laughing too much, so I thought they were caused by smiling. So, logically, I thought the way to get rid of them was to frown a lot. Problem was, hiccupping makes me giggle, so I would physically use my fingers to hold the corners of my mouth down as I tried to rid myself of those pesky giggling hiccups.

rachel

When i was little i thought that the soul was a physical part of your body that looked like shell pasta

Anon

I used to believe that if you were to suck your blood whenever you had a cut that it would go back into your system and you would never lose it like you would by soaking it up with a napkin.

Patrick

If someone said they have heartburn, they're heart was actually on fire.

Anon

When I was five, I was such a ditz that when I cried, I thought that the world really did become distorted (like how it looks through tears).

Anon

My mum once attempted to explain the circulatory system to me, including the bit about valves that only open one way when the pressure of the blood behind them hits a certain level (or something). I got the impression that this happened because you were moving about and that if you ever stopped moving the valves wouldn't work, the blood would pool in one limb in your body and eventually that bit would die. I blame my inability to sit still on that bit of badly explained science.

JD

that sneezes were caused by little pixies crawling up your nose and brushing past your nose hairs

Joanna

i used to believe that if you yawned without covering your mouth that an evil spirit would enter into your body. i remember one night in bed i forgot to cover my mouth as i yawned. i was up for several hours scared to death.

marvin

i thoiught ur lungs were like a sponge and would run out one day so i started holding my breath as long as i could

cameron

I used to believe that everybody breathed in and out at exactly the same time. I would watch my family and notice them breathing at the same time as me. I didn't question it until I found out that it would be impossible.

Nastar

when i was a little kid, my mom told me that every time i got the hiccups i'd grow an inch. i kinda like the idea because it seems kids get 'em more than grown-ups and that's why kids grow up so fast, but adults stop growing.

superxan

I used to think that every time I would hold my breath brain cells in my head would burst. The image I had was of a boiling mass of tomato sauce with all these bubbles on top going *pop* *pop*.
I refused to swim, because that meant my cells in my brain would be popping when I went under.

short of braincells