weeing and pooingShow most recent or highest rated first.
When I was at infant school, my next door neighbour used to look after me in the morning when my mum and dad went to work. One day she asked me if I wanted to spend a penny before I went to school, I thought this meant that we were going to the shops to get some sweets and was very excited, you can imagine my disappointment when she told me what it really meant.
I used to believe, when I was very young, that as women had no penises, women had no private parts altogether. How did they use the toilet, you say? Easy: they peed through the anus.
This belief was revoked when I discussed the matter with my brother, who cracked up laughing saying, "Imagine how disgusting it would be trying to pee and crap at the same time!"
I used to beleive that there was an alligator opening and closing my butthole so i could poop. The door was an oldfashioned drawbridge door. I always felt bad for the alligator because he had to step over my poop to open the door. Also i thought that wen i pooped my pants (since it was still maybe or three and it happened sometimes) that i kept the alligator waited too long so hejust opened the door because he was getting smooshed by the poop. The alligators name was Al.
When my little sister was just potty trained, she thought that when she pooed her insides were coming out. For about a month she would cry whenever she had to do it. Finally, my mom told her what it really was.
It was actually not until I was pretty well grown up that I first encountered the phrase "to take a dump" meaning to poop. For a while I didn't know what was meant. I thought the phrase would mean like falling out of one's chair, or falling off a bicycle or a sled, etc. I finally was corrected in a moment when I was made to feel stupid when the phrase was used and I responded as if it meant someone had fallen onto the floor. Since then I've tried to make a joke of this whole awkward learning experience. Like once recently at a Christmas exhibition, I sat down at the eating area and found I was sitting in a very rickety chair. On inspection I found the chair seemed to be about to fall apart. So I hung a sign on it reading, "Caution. Chair broken. Sitting not recommended. You might take a dump." I hoped someone might find it riotously funny, but I never observed any consequences.
When i was about three, i remember catching a brief glimpse of my brother naked. I could swear that i saw two penis'. So i used to believe that he had one for peeing and one for pooing. I was so stupid -_-;;
When I was young, if I ever had a mouthful of food when the need to poo arose, I feared that sitting on the toilet would cause the food to immediately change to poo. Food always felt mushier when sitting on porcelain.
i used to believe that poop was eggs and i would try to lay them like a chicken in the toilet but i would get scared they would die
I used to believe that girls pee was in their poop, because they have no penis.
I was about 7 and one day I had to pee really bad and I was outside in the pool..thurrs no houses behind mi house so i just went around and swatted and took my pee...my dad went inside to get me some tissues...then a few minutes later my dad had to pee so he went around tha corner and took a pee...when he came bak i asked if he wanted me to go get him tissues to wipe...my parents still tease me to this day because I didnt no all about body parts yet...hahaha
When I was a kid, I heard the 1960s song "Vacation" by Connie Francis. It says at one point, "We're gonna mashed potato to a jukebox tune". I thought it didn't exactly sound like she was literally refering to mashed potatoes. I asked my big brother what it meant. He told me that "to mashed potato" was a euphemistic reference to pooping. So for years I actually thought that Connie Francis sang a song about pooping, which she wouldn't do, nor would any other 60s singer. It would probably be at least two decades before such a thing would become a thinkable subject of a popular song. By the way, would a jukebox tune help one poop? I often envisioned myself needing to poop where a jukebox was playing. I've thought of some tunes that might make it easier for me to go poo in such a public place and others that probably wouldn't.
i used to believe that pooey diapers were supposed to go down the toilet. whenever my sister made a poo in her huggies, i would take them and flush them. even tho it's supposed to clog, i never managed to.
I used to think that women urinated out of their buttholes
i used to think that if i wiped after i pooped, my butt would fall off! i didn't wipe at all between the ages of 4 and 6!
Until I tried it in 3rd grade, my parents told me that if I ate paper my poop would come out in packages.
My little syster (3 years old at the time) used to believe that little boys have a little finger from which the pee comes out...
I had a friend a few years back (she has since moved away) who told me she wanted to become a vegetrian. She told me that eating meat is what causes you to poop, so that vegetarians don't poop. She said she was looking forward to someday becoming a vegetarian so she wouldn't poop. I decided I wanted to do the same. I tried to quit eating meat but my mother got concerned and persisted in asking me why I was not eating my meat unless she pushed me to. Finally I told her I was trying to become a vegetarian so I would quit pooping. She laughed real loud like it was hilarious and called me a foolish little girl. She told me that there was nothing to what my friend said. Since then, I guess I'm sort of getting used to pooping as an okay thing to do.
When I was around 8 my older sister told me that if you force crappin too much you would crap out your intestines.. I would always pray to God on the toilet..
My brother used to believe that he had a man in his butt named Harold. When nature called, Harold would spring to action, and re-do his "living room" by pushing out the old furniture. My brother is now in his late 20's and this still makes for interesting conversation....or so the family thinks...
i used to believe that you pooped and peeed out of the same whole. so i used to think when you had a hard poop to get out, you should start peeing and the pee would escape through the edges of the poo which would create a grease. then it would be easier to poo.