body parts

I was led to believe by my hairy chinned granny, that if I picked the fluff out of my belly button my @rse would fall off!?!

My step-dad told my sister that everytime she learnt something a crinkle was made on her brain. She belevied him and went and asked the science teacher.

Whenever I woke up from a nightmare I thought someone was coming up the stairs to see if I was alright. The steps would be slower and quieter, then fade away. It took me years to realize that the sound was my heart pounding.

Someone told me that if I turned my head real fast I could bite my own ear, so I almost ended up with whiplash and still didn't bite it. And my grandma told me that if I kissed my own elbow I would be able to fly. Feh.

My sister Manda told me that every time I blinked or closed my eyes, my eyes rolled back to look the other way. I've no idea why she told me that!!

I used to believe your belly button was a knot that held you together - my parents had wierd anatomical views

My mum always told me not to put my toenail clippings in the bin as a Witch Doctor could use them to make spells over me. To this day I flush the clippings down the loo!

Someone in my family told me that old peoples wrinkles on their hands were due to getting them caught in the hand rails on early escalators. I still almost believe it now.

Having seen my tonsils I used to believe my throat was divided into two holes. One for food and one for drink. I never mixed food and water in my mouth in case they went down the wrong hole

I used to think that when a man came it was the wax coming off his penis. My older cousin used to tell me that a man could have babies as soon as he could get an erection. Imagine my fright when my wee brother had one when he was 2 months old

When I was three my parents took me to a petting zoo for a treat. I went to pet a billy goat who, for some unremembered reason, rammed his head into me. I thought I'd been butted by his horns so I pulled up my t-shirt to see if I'd been cut. Lo and behold I did have a small hole in my tummy. Yes folks, it was my belly button but I didn't know this so for years I believed it was due to being headbutted by a goat.

I used to believe that if the wind changed when you were pulling your face that you would stick like that

I used to believe…

That the pupil was actually a hole in your eye, and you could put a pencil inside it. I used to hold a pencil up to my eyeball in the mirror, but thankfully never plucked up quite enough courage to do it.

Way back when in the mists of the seventies I believed that my body was made of baked beans, so if you chopped your arm up and looked down the stump it would look like an open can of beans. Looking back it was probably something to do with blood & ketchup being the same colour or the quantity of beans I ate and the expressions from a mother from Yorkshire.

I believed that I had a fake right big toe, having lost my real one in the plug holder (thanks Helen!)

My Dad used to look closely into my ear and say he could see through to the other side ... and I believed him!!