food

I thought swallowing gum was bad because if you swallowed too much it would go to your mouth gums and eventually you would have too much gum in your mouth and you wouldn't be able to talk or eat. Part of me still thinks it's true..

I didnt realize that the purpose of the buttons on the front of drinking machines for handicapped people were to make the machine more accessible to those in wheelchairs, instead, I thought that button dispensed some special type of water, containing medicine or vitamins so that the handicapped people would get better. I always made sure not to push that button and drink the "handicapped water" because nothing was wrong with me.

I used to believe that eating vegetables would make me particularly tall

I used to think that our family of only girls had "girl" cheese sandwiches. While the houses that only had boys had "boy" cheese sandwiches. Later I learned that in Missouri we are lazy speakers and no one enunciated "grilled."

I used to believe…

My mother used to tell me if I drank too much water I would float away. I wanted to see if this would actually happen. So I deliberately drank a lot of water. I imagined a stream of water lifting me up and taking me away. Needless to say, it never happened.

I used to believe that adults were purposely trying to kill me by regularly feeding me Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches. This belief stayed with me until I was an adult and learned I have multiple food allergies including Peanuts and several ingredients in Jelly.

I thought that if I poured my beverage into standing water in the sink, the dishwater would come back up through the stream and into my cup. I would never half pour out a glass of anything for fear of drinking nasty dishwater.

I used to believe…

When I was little, I overheard my grandfather persuade my cousin to eat spinach by promising him it would put hair on his chest. Being a five year old girl, I was horrified by this notion. I refused to touch the stuff until I was nearly thirty.

I used to believe that "drinking and driving" meant drinking anything including water or soda while driving your car. I told my kindergarten teacher that my mom liked to drink and drive.

I used to believe…

When I was little I thought that my body was hollow and when I ate the food would fill it up. When it reached my throat that's when I would get sick and throw up all the food so that I was hollow again!

I used to believe…

My mother used to tell us kids that the potassium in a banana was concentrated at the bottom. If we didn't eat the blackish part at the bottom then we were wasting all the nutrients.

I used to believe that if you ate a lot and kept eating that the food would stack up out of your stomach, through your esophagus and then your throat.

I used to believe…

When my dad would talk about eating "C-rats" (rations) in Vietnam, I thought he meant "sea rats," and pictured him eating some kind of slimy, amphibious rodent that came in a can. I even argued this point with my teacher.

I used to think when I was very very little that when you ordered cakes with your breakfast at diners that they'd bring you a slice of cake from that glass case in the front instead of pancakes.

I used to believe…

When I was little I thought grilled cheese sandwiches were called girled cheese sandwiches and told my little brother that he couldn't eat them. He could have boy'd cheese sandwiches.

I used to believe that when grow ups would shake their drink from side to side (when it had ice), they were heckling how much ice was in it and they somehow knew without looking how much there was.