food: general

My mother always told me not to pour the oil from tuna cans down the sink, and I knew that tuna was somehow connected to killing Dolphins, so I always thought that if you poured the oil from the tuna can down the sink it would kill all the dolphins!

When I was little we used to eat at Chinese restaurants a lot, and I would always see "hunan chicken", as in chicken cooked in the style of the Hunan province in China, on the menu. I misread it as "human chicken" and thought it was made from people. Once my grandma ordered some and i freaked out- "Don't eat it Grandma! Its people!"

For some number of years, my mother had my brother and I convinced that the preparation of meatloaf required that we clean up all the leaves in the yard and give them to her. No, really. There were little green leaf-looking bits in the red sauce of the meatloaf, and we thought it was due to our diligent efforts.

On becoming a little older, I thought to ask why she needed a whole giant trash bag full of dried-out brown fall leaves just to put a sprinkling of green leaf stuff on the meat. So now we just have it with gravy.

This doesn't really count as a belief, but reading someone's Roman Coke story, it reminded me of this... You know when you order something at a restaurant and the waitress/waiter asks you if you'd like a soup or salad? Up until I was about 8 or 9 I always thought (s)he was offering a "super salad". I figured it our the day I was asked if I'd like a soup or salad and I simply sad, "yes, please".

When I was little, I was sitting with my siblings eating bacon when they began to tell me that bacon came from pigs I became quite distraught and insisted that it came from the grocery store.

I used to think it was illegal to eat spaghetti if you were not Italian

When I was very small, one Thanksgiving, I had to go out on an emergency trip with my dad to buy a gravy boat because ours broke. I asked him what a gravy boat was and he told me it was a little boat that floats in the gravy, and when it goes bad, the boat sinks. I believed that until I was about 12 or 13.

My Dad told me that Lamb was man made in a factory, 'cos I wouldn't eat it if I knew it had ben running around in a field.
I believed this for 3 years.

My dad always used to tell me that the bubbles in pop came from bugs in the bottom of the bottles that were trapped in there at the factory. He also used to say that anchovies(on a pizza) were monkey brains.

We used to get a famous brand of butter with picture of a cow on the front, and i used to think the butter was actually made of cows, and would askfor "cow butter" on my sandwiches

My mum used to feed us endless amounts of marrowfat peas. Both my sister and I hated them. I used to think my stomach wouldn't eat them and that they'd pile up to the point where I'd explode and cover evryone in the vicinity with undigested marrowfat peas. To this day my Mum is convinced we liked them.

I used to believe that a brothel was where poor people used to go to get free broth.

My dad used to tell me ""if i ate too many eggs i would become eggbound and explode"", I later discovered he did it so he could have my wartime ration,because I believed him I always let him have my eggs.

My dad told me that kiwi fruits were kiwi birds testicles. They are the right shape and kind of furry

Around the age of six I went through a phase of believeing that sausages were the amputated and cooked limbs of a particular animal, a sort of miniature elephant. This really put me off eating them, especially with tomato sauce.

My parents made me believe that if I ate lamb I would get the wool stuck between my teeth!! Pretty scary when you still believe this when you get older and that is your first meal at your in-laws!!!