food: general

My friend loved blueberries when he was itty-bity, but then his evil older then his sisters told him thatthe ragged tops of the blueberries were spider legs! He now hates blueberries, and won't eat them unless forced by his mommy! ; )

As a very small child shopping with my mother, I saw my mum put a can of tuna in the shopping trolley with a picture of a dolphin on the side (meaning it was dolphin free tuna). I, however, thought it meant it contained dolphins and went into complete hysterics.

My mom used to use a ricer to mash potatoes. The potatoes come out in a thin stream, and I thought that you cut the stream in little pieces and that's how you got rice.

My cousin and I used to believe that if we ate enough food, we would get so big we could lay down in the streets and everyone in the world could jump on our stomaches like trampolines. Needless to say, our plates were usually clean.

When I was young I hated butter and insisted that all the bread/toast I ate was dry. I remember thinking that the toast was still quite "runny" and asked my dad if he'd put butter on it. He said no, it was only the "toast juice". I believed this for a very long time...

When I was younger and my family went out to Chinese food we always ordered several spicy dishes. Consequently I would drink a lot of water with the meal. On the way home from dinner I always needed to pee really badly. For YEARS I thought that there was some ingredient in fortune cookies that made people need to pee.

When I was young I would play grocery store in our family's pantry. I realized one day they list the ingredients on the labels of food products and assumed this was a recipe. I couldn't for the life of me understand why you would put the recipe of your product on the back of your product, and why, for that matter, my mom would buy it instead of just making it herself!

Remember "I can't believe it's not butter?" I used to believe it was this big scam done by the CIA just to trick people into thinking that this stuff WASN'T butter - but really, they were all just being tricked into eating more butter.

I used to believe that when you pulled up to the box at the fast food window (where the food choices are listed) that inside the box sat a little person taht took everyones order.

When I was little I knew that it was illegal to drink & drive, however I thought it was illegal to drink anything (pop, water, juice, etc.) which also made me think that it was illegal to eat & drive. so everytime my praents and I went through a fast food drive through and ate in the car I would get really scared we'd get arrested.

I used to think that the orange and green tictacs gave your special powers. the orange ones would make you stronger and the green ones would make you faster. so i used to eat some green ones and run around my lounge as fast as i could, then eat the orange ones and try to pick up the sofa. i wish it were true!

One day I was eating spaghetti when all of the sudden, i started sniffling and my eyes got very watery. I pushed my food around my plate and did not want to eat it because I was afraid that the spaghetti had once been alive and was now in pain when I ate it. I was hungry so in the end, I ended up crying harder as I ate my food and I apologized to the spaghetti after each bite and asked it to forgive me. T_T

My brother used to believe that his stomach was divided into alphabetised compartments. This was very convenient when he didn't want to finish his dinner but still had space in the 'i' compartment for ice-cream!

Whenever my mother said handbag, I always thought that she was saying hambag and that she kept ham in there so one day after school I said I was hungry and she said she didn't have any food with her. I then said, "then why did you bring your hambag?" and that's when I found out that it was actually called a handbag.

I used to believe that broccoli grew on trees. It looks like a tree, so it made sense, right?

I used to believe that Welsh Rarebit was made out of rabbits