food: general

When I was about 3, my Dad convinced me I didn't like Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches...only Jelly & Peanut Butter. So, when my mom would make me a PB&J I would cry until she made me a J&PB instead. Of course, she just went into the kitchen and flipped it over!

For some reason, I used to believe that if you put grape "stems" (the stuff left over after you've eaten all of the grapes) in the oven, that it'd turn into a huge baked turkey.

I used to think that butter's only use was to cool down hot foods; butter is kept in the fridge and then you cut a slice off put it on hot food and it melts into liquid that cools the food so you can eat it...toast pops up..it gets buttered...hot dinner rolls out of the oven...get the butter...corn-on-the-cob...slather it on!

I had a co-worker who had a very young son. She, her husband, daughter and son had gone out to dinner one night.

The waiter asked everyone what type of dressing they wanted on their salads.

They all said they wanted the "House" dressing.

When the salads came to the table, her son was disgusted.

He said "This is not the kind of dressing we have at the house"!

My father told me that if I ate rhubarb, I'd grow hair on my chest. I thought this would be interesting and was disappointed when it didn't happen (I'm a woman now, and am still waiting)

When I was three I once said to my parents during dinner "You know what's weird? Chicken the animal and chicken the food have the same name." My mom just said "You're right sweetie, that is weird." I don't know when I finally realized the truth, but I've been a vegetarian for ten years now.

Random little tidbit as i'm eating my fav type of pudding over here...it's tapioca--i'm really a sucker for anything vanilla flavored, but anyway--different tangent, haha...my Grandpa Jones, back when i was a kid, told me once that the tapioca pearls were frog eggs...i remember how blown my mind was that i was eating them...To this day, anytime i eat tapioca pudding I think of the nostalgia tied to it...Oh memories [3!

My mom was having a party for people she worked with, I was about 9 years old. She was telling me about all of her co-workers coming over so I asked her "are we gonna have Orgies?" Well, my mom just about dropped her jaw and practically washed my mouth out with soap. "Where did you learn that word!?" she said with a rather harsh tone so now I'm practically in tears and in defense replied.. "THE LITTLE HOT DOGS WITH THE TOOTHPICKS IN 'EM MOM!"

I always thought that when brocolli is broken down to the smallest it can be that the brocolli indeed looked like little sperm... it was my parents secret plot in order to feed it to me and get me pregnant...

There is this syrup called Aunt Jamima and I use to think that she was really my aunt. I used to think wow there's my aunt and she had to sit still for all those pitures.

i used to believe you could buy banana's that would be cut into slices when you opened them

I used to think that if i were to eat chinese food after I had already read my fortune cookie that my fortune wouldn't come true.

Until I was about 11, I thought it was called a 'Girl Cheese' sandwhich.

I used to believe that the reason why my mom never bought Ramen noodles was because they were some sort of very expensive pasta that we couldn't afford. I had no idea what they actually were until I was 12!

When I first learned that ketchup is made from tomatoes, I realized that that must be why ketchup is red. I assumed that mustard, therefore, must be made from something yellow. The only two yellow possibilities I could think of at the time were bananas and lemons. So for quite some time I wondered whether mustard was made from lemons or from bananas.

When I was younger, I thought that powdered doughnuts were called "Power" doughnuts and that if you ate enough, you would become a superhero.

Good thing I thought they tasted terrible.