i used to believe

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When I was 5 I used to believe that i was the only person in the world with the ability to make crunching noises when i ate.

Anon
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I went thru a phase where I thought table scraps had feelings just like people, so every time my mom tried to clear the table, I'd go into hysterics. Once time in particular, I managed to cling to a banana peel for a couple of days before my mom found it and chucked my new friend into the garbage. I cried and pleaded with her, and finally she offered to buy me a banana-peel chew toy, the kind they make for dogs, as a replacement to pacify me. She never did get me one, though.

amanda the weirdo
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I thought when foods were considered "kosher" it was because a rabbi brought the animal into the house and read the bible to them.

Jill
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I used to believe that i had to store food in my room for the winter like the squirrels. I would collect cereal, crakers and canned soups. This was pretty handy when mum send me to bed without supper.

Stephanie
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When I was little I saw a show on TV about cheese and how they made it. It looked like they were just mixing water around and after awhile, it would turn to cheese. So everytime I was in the bathtub I thought I could make cheese by standing up and running around the full bathub. Everytime I did it I swore that the water was getting thicker.

cirrusgurl
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When I was about 9 years old, my Mom gave me some money and told me to get her a pound of lox. Later, I came back home with the money she had given me and told her the man in the hardware store said he only sold locks by the piece, not the pound.

Goofy Kid
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When I was young, we had rabbit for dinner one night. My parents told me it was chicken. I asked why the chicken had four legs.

Anon
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I used to think that when you made food 'from scratch', that scratch was an ingredient like starch.

Aynsleigh
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When I was little, my Mum told me that any food we didn't eat at dinner went to a place called Leftover Land. (Later questioning, after I saw that it in fact was spooned into the bin, revealed that a wizard comes and removes it from the bin before transporting it to Leftover Land.)

She threatened that one day she was going to take us to Leftover Land, where we'd have to eat, finally, all of our associated leftovers.

I sometimes left behind the parts of the meal I liked best, so that when she finally took me I'd be able to have a good time.

Virgil Ierubino
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My roommate who recently turned 23 admitted to me that she used to think capers were animals... you know, like anchovies...

annie
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I don't competely remember how the conversation went but at the dinner table with my husband's family we were talking about pickles. I must have said that I didn't know where pickles came from. I had seriously never thought about it before. They looked at me in wonder and I said something along the lines of, "don't they grow on trees?" Oh the laughter. I was about 22 at the time. I still get teased today.

Anon
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I used to believe that scones were cone-shaped because the word is sCONES.

scone
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I used to think that when something was made from scratch, scratch was a magical sort of playdoughy substance that could be morphed into any shape, taste, or color. But I could not ever find where the scratch in my house was kept.

Anon
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In order to avoid the topic of cannibalism when eating food (I thought that all inanimate objects, food included, had feelings), I believed that the pieces of food I was about to eat was waiting excitedly to ride the roller coaster that was in my stomach.

Jen
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i always said that i hated fish, until my nmum told me the truth when i was nine. those 'special chicken' sandwiches i loved so much were in fact tuna mayonnaise

chel
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My mom used to tell me , 'never leave a single cereal on the bowl'. Because they would cry so hard even the whole house could hear them. Not only that, they would cry out my name. Until now, I always finish my cereal, until the last drop.

Danna
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When I was young I often wondered what rich people ate instead of potatoes.I just knew it had to be something sweet!

Peter
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I used to think if i didnt eat a slice of american cheese before i went to bed, i would die. i think i came up with this when i would try to stay up as late as possible by stalling and saying that i'm hungry. my brother is lactose intolerant, and to my understanding as a young child, i thought that if he ate anything involving dairy, he would eventually die. i guess i thought that since im NOT lactose intolerant, then its just the opposite for me as it is for him, so in order to live, i had to have american cheese every night. no questions asked.

Kerry T
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I used to believe that you HAD to eat ice cream after a meal. My dad used to say that as it melted it filled the cracks between the food already in your tummy - so that you wouldn't creak as you walked!

Cheryl, Johannesburg
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Whenever my mom would take me to a fast food joint, I'd always want her to order me large, or extra large fries if they had them, because I believed I got longer fries if I got a larger size. I even complained once that 'these aren't large fries' because they were too short.

Kya
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