grown-ups

I thought Alzheimer's was Old Timers for the longest time. I've asked a bunch of people and it seems i was alone in this. Hey looking back i think i was clever, wrong but clever.

I have an older brother, and when we were younger my dad would always say to us when we would misbehave, "Your older brother and sister used to do that....and you don't see them here anymore, do you?"
For years we believed that we had an older brother and sister that misbehaved, and my parents got rid of them. Needless to say, we were little angels!!

I used to believe…

My cousin lives on a farm, however her parents are not farmers, that side of the business is looked after by employees. When she was little, she came home from school upset. Her parents asked what was wrong. She exclaimed to her father and mother -

"You're not a *real* farmer, and you're not a farmer's wife!"

She believed that they should look like what you see in story books, gumboots, pitchforks, aprons, and pies cooling on windowsills.

I used to believe that every time my teacher threw a birthday party for kids with summer birthdays, we were already another year older. When I was in kindergarten (6 yrs old), and it got to be spring of my kindergarten year, my teacher threw the summer birthday kids a birthday party (I was one of the summer birthday people) before school ended for the summer. I went home and told my mom I was 7 years old...She said, "No, you're not, you have to wait until August." and I said, "How long until August?" and she said, "Not for a long time." and I said, "Well, I want it to be August NOW!" and then she went on to tell me it just wouldn't work out that way... The same thing happened when I skipped from kindergarten to 2nd grade (I was in 1st grade after kindergarten, but for only one month, then they moved me to 2nd grade). My 2nd grade teacher threw a birthday party for everybody in my class that had summer birthdays (a lot of us!), so I went home again and told my mom I was 8 years old. I was soooo bummed!!

I used to believe…

I was born in 1955. I remember as a kid calculating that if I could stay alive until at least the age of 45 I would live to see the 21st century. I thought I might just squeak by and make it but it was by no means certain because 45 was very old.�

I used to believe…

Cousin Jay would say he could pick us kids up by our ears. When I was 5, I finally caught on to the trick. He'd slip his arms under our armpits and then grab our ears and lift. �

I used to believe…

My Uncle Joe used to tell me he'd squash me like a bug....and then ask me to come hug him. I really believed he'd squash me. �

I used to believe…

I liked cats so much I wanted to be a Vet when I grew up, but, I thought they couldn't eat meat. �

I used to believe…

WHen I was little maybe 7-9 years old, I was really shelter from the harshness of life by my momther. My mom's husband my stepdad was rarely being seen for some time and to me it was no big deal.

One day he was home with us and my mom non-chalant asked for something I thought was very special from him. Never in my wildest naivete was this request something that would effect our lives.

"Jay...I want a divorce."

I thought, "Oh mom wants another present or something for herself nice." I didn't know a divorce meant the worst for a marriage. I will never forget hearing that statement comng from her again.

I used to believe all parents were named Mike and Carol. My parents had the same names as the parents on the Brady Bunch.

I used to believe…

That all adults were aliens and when I was in bed they reverted to real form tall thin shrouded creatures and if you looked into their cowls all you see was darkness

I dreamt that my brother and my mother abandoned me in a bakery..after that I hated to go to the bakers..until I found out that they would never do anything like that

I used to believe that when people go older, their hair would turn white (of course), but also that their eyes would turn light blue. I only had my elderly relatives on my mother's side, who all had white hair when they were still fairly young, and beautiful blue eyes.

I used to believe…

Whenever I asked my father what he did at work, he always responded "I make money." (He was an insurance claims adjuster, so I can see why he couldn't explain that to a 4 year old!). However, I pictured him going to a factory and actually printing money to take home and spend. We were lucky no one ever turned him in for counterfeiting, since that's basically what I told everyone my dad did!

I used to believe…

When I was very young, I saw a picture of children waving at a fire truck. I thought that was strange because I believed firemen were evil doers who burned people's houses down.

I used to believe…

When I was very small, I thought my older brother was the greatest guy alive and when we played make-believe, I always wanted to marry him. I remember telling Mother that "I want to marry Jeremy when I grow up!" And she said, "oh no, dear, you can't!!!" I asked, "why?" She then patiently explained that sisters cannot marry their brothers and it was against the laws of nature. My father, a doctor, later explained to me that such things cause weird birth defects.