grown-ups

I used to believe…

When I was a little kid, I my parents asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, and I proudly told them that I wanted to be a toll booth operator. When they asked me why on Earth I'd want to do that, I explained that it was because people always gave them money.

I was under the impression that they got to keep all of it.

I believed that people in the fifties couldn't see in color. When I was about eight years old I said to my mother, "Mom, when did you start seeing in color?" She was born in 1953.

I used to believe…

When we were younger, my aunt and my mom told us that when we lied, a "mommy dot" showed up on our foreheads. Only mommies and aunts could see it, and it came only when we lied.

I used to believe…

My parents used to tell me if I didn't go to sleep the sandman wouldn't come. I was so scared to go to sleep because I imagined this little leprechaun sprinkling sand in my eyes while I slept.

I thought everyone in a suit was a lawyer, and that you married someone with the same jobs as you. Until around 4th grade (haha, much longer than it should have been, probably)

My parents are both attorneys, and so naturally I assumed when you get a job, you meet someone there, and thats how everyone meets to get married (which does happen, but i thought it was the ONLY place) teachers married teachers, accountants married accountants, etc.

And since my dad's friends all wore suits, and they were lawyers, of course that meant that anyone in a suit was a lawyer, haha.

I used to believe…

The day I turned nine I had to ask my mother how old I was going to be. Sarcastically, she answered, "Nine hundred! How old do you think you are, dummy?!" I went all the rest of that week thinking I was nine hundred years old.

I used to believe…

When I was a kid my Grandfather used to take me to his farm. When he was driving and my brother and I weren't paying attention, he would hong his horn and waive. We would turn around and look behind and he would say, "Didn't you see that fellow in the field?" We never saw anyone, but he convinced us that some "fella" was out there working hard like we should when we get to the farm. It makes me laugh to this day because seemed so serious. Now he just laughs about it how once we believed everything.

He also points to everything with his middle finger. He lives by a busy street and I can't tell you how many times he has pointed to something while outside and people passing by believe he is flipping them of. He get honked at frequently. CLASSIC!

I used to believe…

When my sister started primary school the whole class was asked to stand up and talk about their families. She proudly told everyone that when her dad was younger he travelled to school on the back of a dinosaur, which she had been led to believe. Of course the whole class laughed at her. She was furious with my dad, who hadn't realised how seriously she had taken his stories.

I used to believe…

when i was younger my sister and her friends would tease me all the time and make up things that i would believe. one was that my cousin dana wouldn't drink orange juice unless it was out of a shotglass because she hated drinking it any other way. i never questioned why but i figured thats how she did it. i honestly believed this until i was probably eleven when i said to my sister "well she only drinks it out of shot glasses you know that" she looked at me and laughed and told me that they had made it up.

I used to believe…

when i was really little and one of my cousins told me that i was twins with this girl i had never met because she died or my parents sent her away or something like that. i believed them. the really strange thing is that this girl looked nothing like me and is about 15 years older than i am. i have no memory of this but my mom swears it happened.

I used to believe…

when i was around 6 or 7, I asked my grandmother how did she get wrinkles and she told me that some guy in Colombia named Carlos did them for her. I didnt want to be rude and ask "why because wrinkles make you look ugly?' Not until i was around 11 or 12 i realized it was old age.



She doesnt remember telling me that story -__-

I used to believe…

When my husband was about 4 years old he asked his great grandma "you were around at the time of dinosaurs,what was it like?" The whole family fell off their chairs laughing!

I used to hit golf balls out into the field behind my house when I was about 4. I hit a ball so hard once that when me and my dad went out to look for it he secretly picked it up and threw it in the air, called my name and said look, and then proceeded to catch the golf ball. I believed that I had hit the ball so hard that it stayed in the air for the full 5 minuets.

When I went to tell my mother she called me stupid. =(

I used to believe…

When I was younger, I asked my Mom why black folks were so much better at sports than white folks, as it seemed like professional sports were dominated by African-Americans. She told me that God gave them an extra muscle, hoping that it would make up for some of the hardships they'd faced in this country. During Black History Month, I shared this fact with my 1st grade class, and my teacher quickly tried to change the subject. Unfortunately, the class was waaaaayyyyy too curious about this evolution in the human condition, and the discussion was promptly ended. When I told my Mom about how my teacher seemed to not agree with this information, she called her sister and started angrily quizzing her about the information she'd gotten from her. Apparently, my aunt thought it was hilarious that something she'd told my Mom when she was a little girl had stuck for so long that it was almost passed down another generation. I learned a lot about a lot from that one event.

I used to believe…

When I was younger, my older sister was a tyrant who always got in trouble. When things went awry or if I got hurt, my parents would often ask, "Did she do that?", probably gesturing to my older sister. I hadn't a firm grasp on pronouns at that point, so for the longest time I thought my sister's name was "She" and would talk to her or about her referring to her as such. We didn't put it all together until years later, why I would call my sister "She", rather than her given name.

I used to believe…

When my parents told me I could be anything I wanted to be when I grew up, I decided I wanted to be a horse. I thought they meant I had to change into an animal, I didn't know they meant career. I was sad. I really didn't want to be an animal, but I decided being a horse was the best option.