grown-ups

I used to have this fear that my parents were only taking care of me for a short while longer, like 12 years of age, and then give me away as slave labor, though they were always very caring parents.

I used to beleive that divorce court was when two people went to court and after stating their cases the judge pressed a huge red button and lights and sounds would scream and flash and when the smoke settled the two people would be DIVORCED!

I used to believe…

My little sister and I were misbehaving so my mum started peeling off her sunburnt skin and told that us that if we didn't behave she'd take her batteries out.
By golly we pleaded with her not to take her batteries out and we certainly behaved that night.

I used to believe…

When I was a little girl my grandfather told all his grandkids that Mickey Mouse was his cousin. Being little we all got so excited to have our favorite character in our family

I used to believe…

My siblings used to tell me that I wasn't really their sister and that my parents found me in a dumpster. I believed them and whenever I was mad at my mom I used to scream "Well I'm going to find my real mom!"

I have a long line of ancestors in my family tree named Buckingham, and when I was in grade school I thought I must be related to the Queen of England - Buckingham Palace and all that. I used to think I was very special because of this and went around telling all my schoolmates that I was royalty and that Queen Elizabeth II was my aunt.

I used to think that you weren't supposed to kiss someone on the lips until you married them and if you kissed them on the lips before you married them, you were a vile sinner and would go to hell when you died.

I used to believe…

When I was around 3 or 4, In Day Care, there was a boy who was the same as me who I had a 'crush' on. I really liked him and missed him when I stopped going to that Day Care. Then a few years later, I told my mom that I missed him and that he was probably a grown-up now

I used to believe…

My parents and I had gone to visit some family friends one evening, and being quite small, I fell soundly asleep during the visit. Of course, I awoke in my own bed the next morning, and was quite puzzled as to how I had gotten there. Upon asking my mother how I had arrived home she promptly quipped, "You flew." I was keenly disappointed to think I had flown home through the air in my sleep and hadn't been awake for it.

I once had a nightmare that my mom died and my dad had to take care of us. I woke up crying and went screaming to my mom and said "Mom, don't die! Daddy will make me Cinderella!" I really thought that if my mom died my dad was going to make me a complete slave. My mom still thinks that is funny.

I used to believe…

When I was little, my Dad always used to start stories with "When I was a little girl" so I always believed (I am female) that when I grew up I would become a man and my brother would become a woman.

I used to believe…

When I was little, I was really interested in birds and wildlife. One day, when our teacher asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I told the class that I wanted to be a 'naturist'. I thought a 'naturist' was someone who studied nature. I didn't realise at the time that it meant that you ran around with no clothes on!

I used to believe…

When I was in kindergarten the other kids at school would talk about their moms and dads and they were talking about their names and they asked me what my moms name was, with my mom forgetting at some point to tell me they actually had names, I told them my moms name is mom and my dads name is dad they just laughed and said what is their real name and I said that is their name......I always thought it was a coincidence that both my grandmothers names were mema, thought my parents were destin to be together because of it.

I used to believe that my cousins were my aunts and uncles. For the longest time, I called them Aunt and Uncle, and thought that I must have a lot of aunts and uncles. When I turned 12 or 13, however, I found out that they were my cousins, just that they were 15 or so years older than me. They were the children of my oldest real aunt and had children of their own already.

I used to believe that my grandmother was Mary Poppins when she was younger. She kept telling me how she was able to fly with an umbrella and go on merry-go-rounds when the horses went off the track. I believed this until I was 12 or 13 when I found out that her real maiden name was Martha Poppins (pretty similar to Mary Poppins).

I had a single mum and she never had a boyfriend when i was younger. and since her wardrobe and chest of drawers were the only places i never went in i figured out that must be where she kept my dad. unconnectedly she had won a bottle of whisky and not drinking the stuff she put it in a box under her bed where i wouldn't find it and drink it (yeah i was the kind of child that didn't think before eating/drinking things. such as the bottle of calpol mum left in the fridge) so i told everyone that mum knew that she kept men in the cupboards and whisky under her bed but to not tell anyone since it was a secret and mum was mortified.

I used to believe…

When I was a small child and misbehaved, my older sister who was 19 years older than me, would tell my mother to use "psychology" on me. I believed she was talking about a man named Sy Kology and if I was bad I would be given to him and it did make me behave.