grown-ups

I remember being about 5 or 6 years old when my dad told me that nighttime shadows were holes, so I had to stay out of the shadows or I would fall into the holes. Even into my teenage years, in spite of my knowledge to the contrary, I was still apprehensive about those shadows, which I guess was my dad's goal all along!!!!

I used to believe…

My problem was with 'curiosity killed the cat.' I heard that a lot. But, when I asked my parents to tell me the underlying fable or parable - they wouldn't! They said there was no underlying story. I didn't believe them and though they just didn't want to take the time to tell me the story that that line came from. It would really piss me off.

I use to beleve that something was wrong with my parents since they shared a bed. After all, Rob and Laura Petry had seperate beds and even Lucy and Ricky had two single beds pushed together. I didn't think my parents were normal.

I used to believe…

When I was younger, my babysitter told me that I could me anything I wanted to be when I grew up. I was rather attached to anything Disney at the time and desperately wanted to be Snow White or Sleeping Beauty, but definitly Jasmine. My babysitter couldn't convince me otherwise.

I used to believe…

This i actually what my little brother belived. I had started school and did my homework. My brother wanted to have homework to, so he told everyone that when he became a girl he was going to do his homework.

I used to believe…

When is was a kid.I often saw on the television,programs about oil platforms. I always noticed the tower where they would burn the gas they could not handle. And i thought that they pumped up the oil just so they could burn it.

I used to believe that firemen started fires as well as put them out. I was walking with my mum one day and we saw a parked fire engine, so I said "are they waiting to start a fire?" My mother then explained.

I always believed that garbage men only worked on Mondays because that was the day they came to my house. I couldn't figure out what they did the rest of the week.

I use to get scared because I always thought someone was wearing a mask that looked liked my mom and that my mom had ran away so I would go up to her A LOT to grab her face to make sure it was really my mom! lol

I used to believe…

When I was a child I believed that my parents weren't my real parents and I was adopted. May be I thought so 'couse I didn't look like my parents or anyone in the family, and my siste was the copy of my mom-just younger. Sometimes I still think I was right.

I used to believe…

this is my daughters belief that she told me when she had grown up. She would spend a lot of time brushing my long hair, not just because she liked to do it, but she was looking for the eyes in the back of my head that I had told her that all mothers had.

I used to believe…

when i was 10 years old, i, unlike most girls my age, decided that i wanted to go into outer-space, and i let everyone i met know about it.
i had just been given the "birds and the bees" lecture by my mother on periods and where babies come from. soon after that, my horrable older brother told me that women that went into outer-space needed to have their ovaries and uterus removed so that they didn't get their period, or have babies in space. i imageined that getting my ovaries and uterus removed would be a terrably painful opperation and so i gave up my dream of going into outer-space and then said that i was going to be a cloud when i grew up.

I used to believe…

when I was a kid my parents went thru two ordealing dramas constantly, paying bills, balancing the checkbook and doing taxes, growing up I learned this was all unnecessary hype and no big thing - just a bunch of numbers addded together ,without any hesitation....

I used to believe that "getting fired" meant that if you screwed up really bad at work, the police would come and shoot you with a flamethrower. I pictured it as a garden hose that sprayed fire instead of water. To me, this explained why my mom was always so worried about it.

I used to believe…

when I was young I was always asking my mom questions, "Mom, guess what?" or "Mom!" just to get her attention. I said mom so much that finally one day she said she changed her name, and it was no longer mom. I then asked, "whats your new name then?" and she said she wasn't going to tell me! I was horrified and started crying...eventually she told me she changed it back to mom just for me.

I was a precocious child who wanted to do everything, no matter how difficult. I most desperately wanted to be a doctor, but not just any doctor. When adults would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would loudly proclaim, "An oral surgeon!" I couldn't understand why every grown-up just laughed. I thought "oral" meant "every type of surgery known to man." How could someone not take such a noble profession seriously?!

I used to think the f-word meant to get a divorce because of the following twisted little logic trail: I'd once overheard a kid in a public bathroom asking her mum what that word meant; after much hesitation her mum answered that it was "something that married people do". Well, I already knew it was a bad word - and thus surely must mean a bad thing - and what could be worse for married people to do than to get a divorce?